No sense to explain my absence. I don't expect anyone is still seeking my blog out for updates but I just HAVE to write somewhere from time to time, and figure this is the best place. I mean I have facebook, but who REALLY wants to read my status update on there if all I do is complain? Sure, it's MY facebook, but this is my blog- you're more here reading my posts by choice then you are on facebook, when my update is thrown at you!

CANCER- I received the terrifying news on December 17th, 2010 as we rode in Indiana on our way to first, South Carolina for a couple of days, before we ultimately reached our home state of Florida, where we spent Christmas. Yes, I was diagnosed with Uterine Cancer. Why, oh why did it have to be the very cancer my aunt DIED with? I was in shock... am still in shock... more to come on that later. For now, I just really need to get some of this emotion out. I am rarely able to be at the computer just yet- supposedly recovering from surgery- it's been rough. A whirlwind of emotions- I have not yet let my mind wrap around the fact that I had cancer, and now , supposedly they got it all?

Sure, that's great news....please realize that I PRAISE THE LORD that the cancer was found to have spread, but "only" from the lining of the uterus to the uterus itself. Still, I find myself confused, terrified, scared. I have not had time to really comprehend I have/had cancer, and bam! I've already had a complete total abdominal hysterectomy, been sent straight into menopause, and here we go.

Now before anyone writes me with the "God didn't give us the spirit of fear," let me refer you back to a paragraph above where I said this is MY blog! Sorry, but emotions are emotions- I feel them. I KNOW the right answers but the human side comes out too, and that's o.k. It is what it is. I'll be back, but for now, the pain is overwhelming and I must get back to bed. Pray.

Update through July

No excuses why I haven't posted since June! I have no clue! ha! When I last posted, we were at Yellowstone... so I will post some pictures from the summer and catch you
Father's Day- we were on vacation.... It was special for Glenn to have his Dad with him, since that is a rarity with us living so far away.
up on what's been going on around here.


July 4th, we were blessed to see some awesome fireworks...

Throughout the month of July, we also stayed busy with Seth's tee-ball. He was happy to finally be old enough to participate in sports like his brother and sister have been doing in previous years.

July 24th was our 17th anniversary and we celebrated by going away (whole family) for a couple of nights. It was a really good time and the kids LOVED being in the pool....

Today was my inlaws' 50th anniversary!!! We took this picture today WAY up (2 miles to be exact) on top of a mountain! It was an incredible drive (I drove it actually) and so breath taking! God's creation is incredible!!! How can people deny Him? It's beyond me! Yes, you see snow there. Amazing scenery we saw today; so thankful to be on this vacation!

Yellowstone

I still am in such awe at the beauty that surrounds us here!!! Montana is truly a beautiful place!!! The pictures above, however, were taken at Yellowstone, in Wyoming. We saw a herd of Buffalo crossing the road but really enjoyed watching this Mama and her baby!!! That baby was sure to stay right with his Mama.

Of course, no trip to Yellowstone would be complete without going to Old Faithful!!! Incredible.

Tomorrow is my inlaws' 50th anniversary... we have a very full day planned for Wednesday! I've got to get to bed!

Today has been such a beautiful trip!!! To think that it's the middle of June and I can look out from our hotel room and see a snow covered sight way high on the mountains is incredible.

HOW can anyone deny God?! His handiwork is everywhere! Montana has some magnificent, breath-taking sights!!!! I am so blessed to be here on this trip!

On "vacay"

After church, we headed on the road. We have made it safely to Bismarck, ND where we will spend tonight (actually at this point, the next 6 hours- since we hope to leave tomorrow early to head to Montana).

We are already making memories and just really happy to be together on this trip!

The pictures from today show you a bit about our day... we noticed we would need gas probably before we ever made it to Bismarck. North Dakota, being sparse in "amenities", we knew we needed to stop the first chance we got. We saw a sign saying this exit had gas and took off. We laughed when at first we thought this was the place they were talking about- what at one time was a gas station, now a therapeutic massage clinic! I just had to have a picture though... if you could tell it in this picture, you would see the price of gas here was last .32 cents a gallon. I sure wish I knew what year these pumps are from!

As for the current place of business? Not open on Sunday and still very old style pumps from "my day".

Wow! I have let the time slip by here. YES, I have taken pictures each of those days since I last posted- can't believe it was last May 20th!!! I will post a few here and there to keep you caught up!!! BUT, for now, I just wanted to post that I will return! I actually tried getting on here a couple of times that blogger was doing maintenance or something and I couldn't log in! Oh well.

Reasons for my unplanned hiatus: life here became very hectic, especially where Ethan is concerned. I keep feeling like "normal" is becoming new every day, sometimes every minute. Living with a child with mental illness is not for the faint of heart.

It's easy for it to consume me, and I play the "what ifs". I need to remember to let God handle those and focus on the here and now!!!

In happy news: my inlaws will arrive in just a few hours (I am typing this at 4 a.m.- can't sleep!!!) Then, on Sunday, we are all (after church), hitting the road for the Yellowstone area! We are super excited and well, just let me tell you... this vacation is so very needed! Praying Ethan does well with the change in routine. It's not been pretty around here the past few days.

I plan to post a picture each day of the trip.... stay tuned!

Wednesday and Thursday

This was Cala last night after getting stung by what was evidently a hornet. (she saw something fly away, and then today a neighbor girl told Cala that they have lots of problems with hornets' nests- and the bush where Cala was stung by, borders our property and this girls' family's yard.).

Not knowing if Cala was allergic, we watched her carefully, called the nurse line (from our insurance) and gave her ibuprofen as her finger had swollen twice its normal size! She was quite miserable, but never had chills or fever, etc. She woke up just fine this morning and all is well.

AND in other news! Seth was wrong... I called and verified that Seth actually had one more day of pre-school, so TODAY was his actual last day. Here is a picture of him holding his certificate. He told Cala he is no longer a pre-schooler, but a kindergartener. He is quite proud! I, of course, am wondering where my baby boy went! What will I do in the fall, when he begins Kindergarten?!

Farewell Pre-school

Today was Seth's last day of pre-school. While many of my online friends are shedding tears at high school graduations this week, I am wondering where my little baby man went?! (and he's only five! I can not begin to imagine what they are going through!).

The picture today is of a magnet Seth made for me, at school. I absolutely love it! It will be one of those I keep forever, like another magnet I have- from when my now grown, 22 year old nephew was in Kindergarten and made a drawing onto a magnet. It's still precious to me now!

Time does really fly even if we aren't ready.

Have you ever contemplated what a horse in Minnesota looks like? Well, wonder no more! Here you go... we have many horses around here, many cows, many farms! I absolutely love that!

Yah, you betcha!

Catch up pictures!

So here we go... Friday- We went to Ethan's field day at school. It was early in the morning and windy! Ethan's team placed first in most events.

That evening, Glenn was gone into the Cities and so it was just the kids and me. We had a wonderful time, stayed out shopping for Glenn's upcoming birthday, ate pizza (it spikes Glenn's blood sugar too high so this was a real treat for the kids and I since we just don't get it anymore)... I let the kids stay up way too late and we all welcomed Papa back home.



Saturday- We stayed in, did our usual "big" cleaning, continued Spring cleaning... and was just still happy to have found this painting on Friday at a yard sale... we have it hanging above our bed.... Since we moved here, there has been this space that needed a painting or a picture, something! We would look, but at the stores, everything is just way too expensive and at yard sales even, most things were more than I wanted to pay. We spotted this on Friday, and I got out to look. I snapped it up when I saw it was just ONE dollar!!!! We both laugh now that we can't believe we bought a SNOWY scene but it is a mountain scene which we both love!

And then there's today- Sunday.... This afternoon, following dinner ("lunch"), I made a grocery list and headed to Wal-mart while the kids (and Glenn) took a nap. Being from busy central Florida, I am used to crowds at Wal-mart, and so, admittedly, the crowd here on a Sunday is nothing compared to that, but it was crowded for here, and I've grown accustomed to the slower pace. HA I think I'll stick to week day grocery shopping!

We are so often headed on the road in this direction, it just seemed the right thing to do to take a picture! :o)

Please pray tonight (or whenever you read this) for Ethan. He's not doing so well right now with his mental illnesses. In fact, right now, depression has hit him majorly. I ache for my son and can't help but wonder what his life will be like years from now... Yet, I know that God is able and I simply need to live in the 'here and now'. (otherwise, I would spend much more time crying!).

Please pray for Ethan and all those struck with mental illness. It's real, and it's rough.

More scenery from around here :o)

Today has been spent with a headache! I hate when that happens, but it happens often lately. (something to do with that ol ' barometric pressure).

I enjoyed church tonight anyway, and am so glad I made it. I needed that "re-charge" for the rest of my week!

Cala is so photogenic! I took this this evening as she came out of group therapy. The kids enjoyed it, and it gives Glenn and me 3 hours alone. We get to have a date and enjoyed supper out and then went by Target for a few groceries.

Weather wise, it couldn't have been a nastier day- so very dreary and chilly. The Florida girl in me wanted to rebel and take off the coat, but alas, that wasn't possible! May? Really?

Saturday's picture and Today (Monday)

So, as promised, a picture from Saturday... Saturday was May 8th... Cala's Family Day- some call it Gotcha Day, Adoption Day, Forever Day, but we call it Family Day. Cala became our daughter on May 8th, 2001 when we were able to take her home! :o) We then lived in St. Petersburg, Russia, her native city.

Each Family Day, we give our child something that represents their native culture, their heritage... this year, we gave Cala this sweat shirt with Russia on it, the map of the country and a Russian girl with a traditional dress on. Cala LOVED it!

We are truly blessed with this sweet girl! She suffers from Fetal Alcohol as her birth mother drank throughout the pregnancy, but Cala is just the type to turn that around and use it to her advantage- her creativity is amazing, and she has turned out to be a wonderful artist.

***** Now, for today- Monday, May 10th... ***** This morning, I told the boys that it is Mother's Day in their native lands of El Salvador and Guatemala. Ethan asked, "so, it's our birth mothers' Mother's Day?" :o)

We had a full afternoon of appointments and as I type this at 10:25 p.m., we really haven't been home too long. That's life for us right now, as we try to get Ethan all the help we can with his mental illnesses. We are just grateful we are able to get the help we need.

Today's picture: This was taken in the parking lot of a store Glenn ran into today. The kids and I waited while he went in for a few minutes... it was such a rainy, rainy, dreary day. The kids enjoy the van and the fact that it's easy when waiting to get up out of their car seats and roam around a bit.

I will have to post yesterday's picture with tomorrow's. Today, though, I didn't want Mother's Day to pass without posting a picture of my Mama and me. This was taken last year in July, when she visited us for two weeks. We are planning for her to visit us again this July or August, and I am so looking forward to that.

Mama is a wonderful woman, and is the type of mother all mothers should aspire to be, the type of lady all women should aspire to be. (I can hear her now reminding me that all ladies are women, but not all women are ladies!).

I am truly blessed and miss her very much! I can't wait to see her this summer. Happy Mother's Day!

Today, as my Mother's Day gift, we picked up the kids a little early from school and went an hour and a half away to spend the night and part of tomorrow. We had a wonderful afternoon and evening!!! Where we are staying has an old timey arcade (complete with Pac-man--- a blast from the past) and a pool table.

This has been what the kids call, "the best day ever!"

Wednesday and Thursday

Wednesday's picture- this was taken right after church last night. These boys are such blessings to my life! They are rascals, they are sweet, they are buzzards!, they are precious, they are real characters!, but I am just so very happy and grateful to God that they are my sons!






Today's (Thursday) picture- Ethan was in a play today. It was really cute. He was thrilled we were there (and so was a couple of our church members).

Monday and Tuesday's pictures

Yesterday, this little guy spent the afternoon waiting on his sister and brother while they had appointments. Seth has gotten used to it and does well to have to go to so many places throughout the week.

Today was yet another busy morning, with a psychiatrist appointment for Ethan. We came back by the school, dropped Ethan off, came home, waited on the bus to take Seth to pre-school and I thought that would be it. Thankfully though, Glenn surprised me with lunch out, just the two of us. We tried a Mexican restaurant we had never been to and really enjoyed it!

Today's picture is just one of the trees that we have growing around here this time of year. I love the colors we are starting to see... no, not as much as I enjoy fall, but the trees around here are beginning to get beautiful!

Tomorrow is promising to be yet another very busy day, but at least we have church in the evening , where we can re-charge :o)

Sunday

After church this morning, we all changed clothes and headed out for Sunday dinner. This picture of my kids was taken this afternoon. I love these little guys! I'm blessed and so very grateful to God for allowing me to be their Mama.

**Pray for our family in South Carolina once again... my Uncle Ernest died two weeks ago yesterday. His wife, Aunt Juanita died this evening! She told Mama right after my Uncle's death, "I won't be here long!" Praising the Lord she has been reunited with her dear husband.**