We pulled out at 12:51 a.m. EST from my Mama's house. (that seems so weird to say instead of "my parents' house."). It was of course difficult to leave and it felt as if my safety net was gone. It's been so very nice (if there is anything nice right now) to have the comfort of being together with those in the same trenches as I am, grieving, missing the same man.
As we always have done in our family, we gathered around before leaving, and prayed. It was my Mama, my brother, his wife, their daughter, and my family gathered in the living room standing hand in hand praying. My brother led the prayer for our safety and for us to have a good trip, to have smiles and laughter even though this would normally not be that kind of trip. That prayer has stuck with me throughout the day.
The kids slept later than usual, until 9 a.m. at least, and then went back to sleep for most of the day!!!! I couldn't believe it. We were able to get all the way up to Marion, Illinois. According to Mapquest, we have driven 877 miles today. We got here by 4:15 this afternoon, Central time.
God was so good to us.... a friend of mine that I met online a few years ago now (we are in the same yahoogroup together) lives here in this city. We were able to go out to supper with she and her family. We've done this now 3 times or so when we've come through. What a blessing it was tonight to just relax with them. My friend's husband lost his Mom six months ago. It was comforting to talk to him, because I heard much of myself (and my brothers) in his words- the feeling fine about things one day and the next day crying.
After supper, we came back to the hotel where we let the kids swim for awhile and now, they are fighting over covers as I type! ha
I am also just so totally excited for a dear friend of mine who has unexpectedly become the Mama to a baby boy :o) What a blessing it was to be excited for someone amidst my sadness.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Hitting the Road....
I have just a minute but wanted you to pray for us, as we are hitting the road right now after I send this blog (literally)!
Please pray that the van will do o.k. It supposedly is fine now. I will type more from the hotel as long as the wi-fi will work (bad luck with that recently, so I pray I get a connection!)
It is understandably VERY VERY hard to leave here. Daddy is everywhere in this house. I will now be back in Minnesota without the ones that are going through it the same time. That's sad, but that's life. I thank God for Glenn and that's a blessing! Many don't even have that in times like these!
Please pray that the van will do o.k. It supposedly is fine now. I will type more from the hotel as long as the wi-fi will work (bad luck with that recently, so I pray I get a connection!)
It is understandably VERY VERY hard to leave here. Daddy is everywhere in this house. I will now be back in Minnesota without the ones that are going through it the same time. That's sad, but that's life. I thank God for Glenn and that's a blessing! Many don't even have that in times like these!
Last Couple of Days
I am finding I prefer to update daily because now I have two days to type out! ha
My aches are more or less better- terrible headache today but that's gone, praise the Lord! (we were working on lots of "after death" stuff and it really can be overwhelming!)
Yesterday, Ethan was set to go to the doctor as a follow up to his ER visit (strep throat) last week. However, because he seemed to be all better, I called and got it set up for Cala to take that appointment, because she found a "lump" under her right arm, on Friday evening... it got larger as the days went on. I love our insurance. Really I do... I called and had it all set up as to where she could be seen down here and they agreed. Because of the whole thing of first setting it up for Ethan, changing it to Cala thing, it entailed a few phone calls.
SO, I get Cala to the doctor's office yesterday (where I went when I lived here), only to be told "oh! That insurance won't pay us." I insisted they would, and then was led to a part of the building I never knew existed to talk with who I suppose is in charge of billing.... "that insurance is no good here." I say, "yes, it is." "No, it's not." "Yes, it is." I insure the woman that I had been on the phone with my insurance company, and they were all set to pay it. She insists no matter what, she knows they won't. "You have to go to an Urgent Care type of place, not a primary care physician", blah blah blah ad nauseum. (always wanted to use that phrase, "ad nauseum"- lol). I ended up very, very VERY upset (I confess I was more upset than I even understand), and home we came.
Long story short (too late you're saying), I found a place that readily accepted Cala- and took her this morning. Diagnosis? CAT SCRATCH "DISEASE" (aka "cat scratch fever- she had a low grade fever last night and tonight)! The doctor says that probably it's from our own cat, that the symptoms many times don't unfold for 2 to 3 weeks. Cala's response? "Evil pest". ha I said, "Cala, she really doesn't care for being dressed up all the time!" Cala is now on an antibiotic. (two kids on antibiotics at the same time- CAN my fibromyalgia laden memory keep up?!).
And then... there's our van... our dear, tired van... was supposed to be ready today. The mechanic says tomorrow. He also says he is going to drive it 30 to 40 miles to make sure it's really working- good plan dear mechanic! I sure hope it's set to go tomorrow so we can get home this weekend!!! Cala is to be at camp Monday morning!
My aches are more or less better- terrible headache today but that's gone, praise the Lord! (we were working on lots of "after death" stuff and it really can be overwhelming!)
Yesterday, Ethan was set to go to the doctor as a follow up to his ER visit (strep throat) last week. However, because he seemed to be all better, I called and got it set up for Cala to take that appointment, because she found a "lump" under her right arm, on Friday evening... it got larger as the days went on. I love our insurance. Really I do... I called and had it all set up as to where she could be seen down here and they agreed. Because of the whole thing of first setting it up for Ethan, changing it to Cala thing, it entailed a few phone calls.
SO, I get Cala to the doctor's office yesterday (where I went when I lived here), only to be told "oh! That insurance won't pay us." I insisted they would, and then was led to a part of the building I never knew existed to talk with who I suppose is in charge of billing.... "that insurance is no good here." I say, "yes, it is." "No, it's not." "Yes, it is." I insure the woman that I had been on the phone with my insurance company, and they were all set to pay it. She insists no matter what, she knows they won't. "You have to go to an Urgent Care type of place, not a primary care physician", blah blah blah ad nauseum. (always wanted to use that phrase, "ad nauseum"- lol). I ended up very, very VERY upset (I confess I was more upset than I even understand), and home we came.
Long story short (too late you're saying), I found a place that readily accepted Cala- and took her this morning. Diagnosis? CAT SCRATCH "DISEASE" (aka "cat scratch fever- she had a low grade fever last night and tonight)! The doctor says that probably it's from our own cat, that the symptoms many times don't unfold for 2 to 3 weeks. Cala's response? "Evil pest". ha I said, "Cala, she really doesn't care for being dressed up all the time!" Cala is now on an antibiotic. (two kids on antibiotics at the same time- CAN my fibromyalgia laden memory keep up?!).
And then... there's our van... our dear, tired van... was supposed to be ready today. The mechanic says tomorrow. He also says he is going to drive it 30 to 40 miles to make sure it's really working- good plan dear mechanic! I sure hope it's set to go tomorrow so we can get home this weekend!!! Cala is to be at camp Monday morning!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Physically not feeling well. Those of you who have been with me a long time here in blog land know that I have something other than fibromyalgia that was diagnosed. The unknown diagnoses, well, I just need to get back home and get started on the specialist appointments.
Anyway, whatever I have is sure giving me a problem right now, so pray for me.
I just sat down here to check email and realized I had not blogged since Wednesday. I don't mean to get out of that habit, just busy here making phone calls for Mama and for the missionary wife we are trying to raise money for. Both are going well.
As for us, we want to get back home to Minnesota. Remember the van's transmission? Well, that got fixed and then on Thursday right before we were leaving for our night away (for our anniversary), the van gave out again! The mechanics claimed it was a sensor button or something that was working just fine when they last fixed the transmission. $40 later, we brought the van home at 4 p.m. Friday. I took off to Wal-mart only to hear it happening again. I told Glenn, he took the van while I finished up at Wal-mart (and had my inlaws car).... he called saying it must have been bad gas because it was working fine. I said, "praise the Lord! I hope you're right!". All that only to have Glenn call me 10 minutes later saying he made it home, but that was it. (was supposed to go to another store). The van was making the same sounds as it did before we had last taken it to the mechanic!!!!
AND SO- the mechanics were now closed, but won't they be surprised tomorrow morning when they get to work and see our vehicle back there?! (Glenn and his Dad already deposited it there). PLEASE PRAY we get this fixed, and that they are honest and do it right.
We simply want to get back home.
Anyway, whatever I have is sure giving me a problem right now, so pray for me.
I just sat down here to check email and realized I had not blogged since Wednesday. I don't mean to get out of that habit, just busy here making phone calls for Mama and for the missionary wife we are trying to raise money for. Both are going well.
As for us, we want to get back home to Minnesota. Remember the van's transmission? Well, that got fixed and then on Thursday right before we were leaving for our night away (for our anniversary), the van gave out again! The mechanics claimed it was a sensor button or something that was working just fine when they last fixed the transmission. $40 later, we brought the van home at 4 p.m. Friday. I took off to Wal-mart only to hear it happening again. I told Glenn, he took the van while I finished up at Wal-mart (and had my inlaws car).... he called saying it must have been bad gas because it was working fine. I said, "praise the Lord! I hope you're right!". All that only to have Glenn call me 10 minutes later saying he made it home, but that was it. (was supposed to go to another store). The van was making the same sounds as it did before we had last taken it to the mechanic!!!!
AND SO- the mechanics were now closed, but won't they be surprised tomorrow morning when they get to work and see our vehicle back there?! (Glenn and his Dad already deposited it there). PLEASE PRAY we get this fixed, and that they are honest and do it right.
We simply want to get back home.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Happy Anniversary to Glenn and me!
I am blogging this afternoon since Glenn and I are getting ready to head out for the night. Thank the Lord Ethan has broke his fever and is feeling way better. He's now not contagious and is able to be with his brother and sister at my inlaws house.
Glenn found a great deal on a nice play and so we are heading on out. We were never sure we would be able to this year, but I am glad we are. This is traditionally our gift to one another- we decided that a long time ago, many many years ago (actually I think on our first anniversary!), that we would spend a night away as our gift. Now, it's not always worked out, because we lived in Russia, but even then after we had Cala, we would have someone watch her for a couple of hours so we could at least go out to eat.
This year we just thought we wouldn't be able to due to Daddy's death, and even though I have had a rough morning (as we all have- I think mostly due to realizing it was 2 weeks ago today), I am glad Glenn said "Yes, we are going!" (even last night we thought we wouldn't!).
So, off I go to get ready... we are leaving at 3 p.m.- just happens to be the time we got married. (15 years ago!)
Glenn found a great deal on a nice play and so we are heading on out. We were never sure we would be able to this year, but I am glad we are. This is traditionally our gift to one another- we decided that a long time ago, many many years ago (actually I think on our first anniversary!), that we would spend a night away as our gift. Now, it's not always worked out, because we lived in Russia, but even then after we had Cala, we would have someone watch her for a couple of hours so we could at least go out to eat.
This year we just thought we wouldn't be able to due to Daddy's death, and even though I have had a rough morning (as we all have- I think mostly due to realizing it was 2 weeks ago today), I am glad Glenn said "Yes, we are going!" (even last night we thought we wouldn't!).
So, off I go to get ready... we are leaving at 3 p.m.- just happens to be the time we got married. (15 years ago!)
Sorry for the no post last night- we have been extremely busy here for the good- of course not all has been fun- taking care of "business" that has to be done after someone dies.
We also will probably be going back home on Monday- would have gone tomorrow, but Ethan has strep throat... side note: our 15th anniversary is tomorrow.
However, we have now been trying to help a fellow missionary wife in need. She is a missionary wife in Scotland... while we were on the trip to South Carolina, we learned that her father had passed away and they were trying to get her out of Scotland to the states for the funeral. When she first learned of the death, the ticket for she herself was $1400. By the time she had found someone who could charge it to a credit card, it had shot up to a whopping $2400!!! (yes, just for one person!). This burdened the hearts of my husband, my brother and I, and through this, we have been busy working to raise the money to re-pay this debt of hers. We've sent countless emails and have been making phone calls and are making some progress. We are excited to see what God will do!
My Daddy was a champion of raising money for missionaries and we feel like this would be a great way to honor him. (want to donate, by the way? ;o/ I gladly will tell you where to send the check.
We also will probably be going back home on Monday- would have gone tomorrow, but Ethan has strep throat... side note: our 15th anniversary is tomorrow.
However, we have now been trying to help a fellow missionary wife in need. She is a missionary wife in Scotland... while we were on the trip to South Carolina, we learned that her father had passed away and they were trying to get her out of Scotland to the states for the funeral. When she first learned of the death, the ticket for she herself was $1400. By the time she had found someone who could charge it to a credit card, it had shot up to a whopping $2400!!! (yes, just for one person!). This burdened the hearts of my husband, my brother and I, and through this, we have been busy working to raise the money to re-pay this debt of hers. We've sent countless emails and have been making phone calls and are making some progress. We are excited to see what God will do!
My Daddy was a champion of raising money for missionaries and we feel like this would be a great way to honor him. (want to donate, by the way? ;o/ I gladly will tell you where to send the check.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Strep throat amongst us....
Ethan (age 5) woke up this morning saying his throat was hurting, his stomach was too and he just didn't feel good.
By 11 a.m., Glenn said Ethan was burning up. Sure enough- a temp of 102.3. I called our insurance which instructed me to head to the ER- he had a temp of 102.5 by then....Ethan and I were at the ER from noon to 4:35 p.m.! We then took the 3 prescriptions to the drug store. Yes, it's strep. My 12 year old niece has strep so we knew right off he should go be checked out. Please pray for the rest of this household... already being run down from stress, travel, etc., it would be easy for us to get sick.
I don't even want to get into my experience at the ER. There has just got to be a more efficient way to see really sick people quicker. (I felt especially bad for the 9 month old baby with a 104.9 temp!).
While I was gone, I missed an online friend of mine. We are from the same city- grew up here, but never had met until about 4 years ago now. We were both here in Florida at the same time. When we met online, I lived in Russia, and she lived where she does today- in Virginia. We met by "chance" and saw we were from the same relatively small city. (much larger now than it was when we were growing up).
ANYWAY- she has been here for a few days, and today while I was at the ER, she brought a FEAST of Sonny's Barbecue for us. That was so very nice. It ended up feeding 11 people! It was great to feel loved and cared for even now, a few days out from Daddy's death.
I think I am learning many things that I want to write down somewhere to remember when someone dies- where I need to encourage them, etc.
Keep praying for us! We are trying to make our plans as to when to go back home to Minnesota .....not yet sure.
By 11 a.m., Glenn said Ethan was burning up. Sure enough- a temp of 102.3. I called our insurance which instructed me to head to the ER- he had a temp of 102.5 by then....Ethan and I were at the ER from noon to 4:35 p.m.! We then took the 3 prescriptions to the drug store. Yes, it's strep. My 12 year old niece has strep so we knew right off he should go be checked out. Please pray for the rest of this household... already being run down from stress, travel, etc., it would be easy for us to get sick.
I don't even want to get into my experience at the ER. There has just got to be a more efficient way to see really sick people quicker. (I felt especially bad for the 9 month old baby with a 104.9 temp!).
While I was gone, I missed an online friend of mine. We are from the same city- grew up here, but never had met until about 4 years ago now. We were both here in Florida at the same time. When we met online, I lived in Russia, and she lived where she does today- in Virginia. We met by "chance" and saw we were from the same relatively small city. (much larger now than it was when we were growing up).
ANYWAY- she has been here for a few days, and today while I was at the ER, she brought a FEAST of Sonny's Barbecue for us. That was so very nice. It ended up feeding 11 people! It was great to feel loved and cared for even now, a few days out from Daddy's death.
I think I am learning many things that I want to write down somewhere to remember when someone dies- where I need to encourage them, etc.
Keep praying for us! We are trying to make our plans as to when to go back home to Minnesota .....not yet sure.
Mama is back
Mama got back from South Carolina this afternoon. She made it just in time for evening services at church. She is doing "o.k." She said it would be very hard to now be back here.
I sat with her while she fell asleep tonight. I know it's rough on all of us so it must be thousand times worse for her. :o/
Dad is everywhere in this house- I mean you just imagine him in every part... memories flood us.
I sat with her while she fell asleep tonight. I know it's rough on all of us so it must be thousand times worse for her. :o/
Dad is everywhere in this house- I mean you just imagine him in every part... memories flood us.
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Back in Florida
We made it back "home" (where I grew up) to Florida, this evening... went out for supper with my inlaws, and then, well then... I got sick. Not sure that this is just emotions or the unknown illness I deal with (and YES! I WILL be getting in touch with a rheumatologist when I get back to Minnesota!)... whatever it is, I feel rough.
Glenn unfortunately feels strange too. I think the whole whirlwind trips have taken their toll on us. You have to remember that a little over a month ago, we came from Minnesota to Florida, then back to Minnesota, back to Florida last week, then to South Carolina, back to FLorida now. In that time frame also, our van's transmission went out (covered by warranty, BUT we have to come up with the $500 plus towing fees, only God knows from where), and then the car we were using of my inlaws- we had to replace a tire on that while in Georgia... replaced that this morning. Of course in that time frame, we saw my Daddy really close to death, got here AFTER his death, went through two viewings, two funerals, and here we are.
I think the stress, the grief, the finances are just weighing us down. I know God is there, just really really need Him to step in big time now.
I really missed my boys, but we had to send them back to my inlaws for the night- unable to take care of them really tonight. They don't mind- they love spending time there and they were happy to see their sister. (she's with them too).
This house seems so strange without Daddy. I realize that won't change for many years to come. It's just surreal right now.
Glenn unfortunately feels strange too. I think the whole whirlwind trips have taken their toll on us. You have to remember that a little over a month ago, we came from Minnesota to Florida, then back to Minnesota, back to Florida last week, then to South Carolina, back to FLorida now. In that time frame also, our van's transmission went out (covered by warranty, BUT we have to come up with the $500 plus towing fees, only God knows from where), and then the car we were using of my inlaws- we had to replace a tire on that while in Georgia... replaced that this morning. Of course in that time frame, we saw my Daddy really close to death, got here AFTER his death, went through two viewings, two funerals, and here we are.
I think the stress, the grief, the finances are just weighing us down. I know God is there, just really really need Him to step in big time now.
I really missed my boys, but we had to send them back to my inlaws for the night- unable to take care of them really tonight. They don't mind- they love spending time there and they were happy to see their sister. (she's with them too).
This house seems so strange without Daddy. I realize that won't change for many years to come. It's just surreal right now.
Friday, July 18, 2008
In Savannah area
We are in a hotel in the Savannah, GA. area. (going back to Florida a different way than we went to S.C.)
I completely fell apart when we crossed the Georgia line. I then dozed off and woke up because my brother called. I heard Glenn telling him, "she's 'o.k.' right now but broke down over the Georgia line... I'm sure it's because of leaving South Carolina, she feels as if she's leaving her Daddy even though she knows He's in heaven. She's just missing him so much." I'm thankful for my family. We've been trying to all check on each other daily.
I thank the Lord for my husband all the time, but especially right now. He gets me completely! It was completely right. I just feel so lonely even though my brothers are grieving just as much, and certainly Mama is grieving more.
It's just, I can't explain it all I guess. I just ache.
I'm not sure who I told what, so please forgive me - on the way to Florida, our van's transmission gave out. This is the THIRD time on this 1999 Ford Windstar- the second time since November!!!! It was under warranty but we had a rough time figuring out where we had it done in November.... (Glenn wasn't with me in Florida when that happened, and I didn't have a mind at all, much less now). ANYWAY- good news is after much hassle, it's fixed as of today- free because of the warranty, but we do have to pay $500 in towing fees.
THEN, as we pulled off our exit here in the Savannah area, Glenn noticed a tire on my inlaws car (we borrowed to make the trip to S.C.), needs changing! Thank the Lord we are here at the hotel same exit with a Wal-mart where we will get it fixed tomorrow. Please pray for the $ for both these things. :o/ I so feel like I am falling apart, but God has always worked these things out for us. Please pray. I appreciate it.
I completely fell apart when we crossed the Georgia line. I then dozed off and woke up because my brother called. I heard Glenn telling him, "she's 'o.k.' right now but broke down over the Georgia line... I'm sure it's because of leaving South Carolina, she feels as if she's leaving her Daddy even though she knows He's in heaven. She's just missing him so much." I'm thankful for my family. We've been trying to all check on each other daily.
I thank the Lord for my husband all the time, but especially right now. He gets me completely! It was completely right. I just feel so lonely even though my brothers are grieving just as much, and certainly Mama is grieving more.
It's just, I can't explain it all I guess. I just ache.
I'm not sure who I told what, so please forgive me - on the way to Florida, our van's transmission gave out. This is the THIRD time on this 1999 Ford Windstar- the second time since November!!!! It was under warranty but we had a rough time figuring out where we had it done in November.... (Glenn wasn't with me in Florida when that happened, and I didn't have a mind at all, much less now). ANYWAY- good news is after much hassle, it's fixed as of today- free because of the warranty, but we do have to pay $500 in towing fees.
THEN, as we pulled off our exit here in the Savannah area, Glenn noticed a tire on my inlaws car (we borrowed to make the trip to S.C.), needs changing! Thank the Lord we are here at the hotel same exit with a Wal-mart where we will get it fixed tomorrow. Please pray for the $ for both these things. :o/ I so feel like I am falling apart, but God has always worked these things out for us. Please pray. I appreciate it.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Quick note
Just wanted to post to say that I will have no internet tonight- we will be staying in the mountains where my Mama is staying- with 3 of her sisters. Please pray that we will get internet tomorrow night where we will stay in a motel. (long story, but something got changed in our laptop, and I wonder if it will work elsewhere.... so just pray).
Hopefully will post tomorrow night.
Hopefully will post tomorrow night.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Wednesday
This morning, my youngest brother's family took off back to Florida... they made it home tonight. My middle brother (who was staying with us) and his family left this morning, and will be back to Florida tomorrow sometime. It was so hard letting them go, even though we'll see them this weekend.
We originally were planning to leave S.C. tomorrow, arriving in Florida on Friday. However, we now are leaving Friday, arriving Saturday. We just really feel the urge to see my Mama all we can, and she leaves here Sunday.
As for Minnesota- all depends on our van. It's not yet been fixed because the place where we first got it worked on is refusing to do so... saying they have no records of us having it done there. Long story- just please pray we can prove it and get it done.
We went by the grave today, I cried and cried. This is so hard.
We will leave this hotel tomorrow and head to some aunts' home where as of tonight, Mama is staying. Tomorrow afternoon, we are all going to visit with my Daddy's brothers and their wives.
Tonight was extremely difficult... visited with my 36 year old cousin, the one whom I was always closest to, and she now has colon cancer. SO sad, so very sad. I knew it would be hard to see her, but wow. It hurts.
We originally were planning to leave S.C. tomorrow, arriving in Florida on Friday. However, we now are leaving Friday, arriving Saturday. We just really feel the urge to see my Mama all we can, and she leaves here Sunday.
As for Minnesota- all depends on our van. It's not yet been fixed because the place where we first got it worked on is refusing to do so... saying they have no records of us having it done there. Long story- just please pray we can prove it and get it done.
We went by the grave today, I cried and cried. This is so hard.
We will leave this hotel tomorrow and head to some aunts' home where as of tonight, Mama is staying. Tomorrow afternoon, we are all going to visit with my Daddy's brothers and their wives.
Tonight was extremely difficult... visited with my 36 year old cousin, the one whom I was always closest to, and she now has colon cancer. SO sad, so very sad. I knew it would be hard to see her, but wow. It hurts.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Tuesday
I am just posting quickly since I know some will be wondering about me, and the funeral today. As funerals go, Daddy has had two really good ones! It's unique of course to have more than one in the first place, but I am telling you... Daddy would have loved both... been happy about the turn out of family and friends and the loved shown to us all.
We are hurting deeply tonight- seeing his face for the last time is a pain that at this moment, I can't even process it all. Mama is doing good honestly, but we all know it comes in waves. Right now, she is surrounded by her family, her sisters and brothers. She is where she grew up, but the leaving here will be a deep hurt- knowing Daddy is not on this trip- is not coming back to Florida.
Sure we understand he's in a much better place, and of course I wouldn't want him to come back to suffering, nor would I want him to leave heaven- even if he were healthy here- I just miss him so very badly! sooooooo very badly, and I can't begin to know how to live in a world without my Daddy (even though I know I have to).
We are hurting deeply tonight- seeing his face for the last time is a pain that at this moment, I can't even process it all. Mama is doing good honestly, but we all know it comes in waves. Right now, she is surrounded by her family, her sisters and brothers. She is where she grew up, but the leaving here will be a deep hurt- knowing Daddy is not on this trip- is not coming back to Florida.
Sure we understand he's in a much better place, and of course I wouldn't want him to come back to suffering, nor would I want him to leave heaven- even if he were healthy here- I just miss him so very badly! sooooooo very badly, and I can't begin to know how to live in a world without my Daddy (even though I know I have to).
Monday, July 14, 2008
Monday evening
We made it to South Carolina this afternoon. We are staying in a nice hotel and as far as that goes, are thankful and able to relax here a bit.
Tonight, we went to an aunt's house (my Mama's sister) and had supper, amongst many, many family members- something like 45 were there. (Mama is one of 11 kids!)
I must say it was nice to see some who knew how we feel because they've been there. Their remarks are sincere when they say, "I understand how you feel, what you're going through." I appreciate those greatly.
Tomorrow, we will be having a viewing from 12 to 2 p.m. and then have the funeral and burial. This is at the church where my Daddy grew up. It's an old, old church, from the late 1700's. (YES! 1700's). Many a confederate soldier is buried out there, I know that, and many a folk with my maiden name were laid to rest there. I've visited the grave site many times through the years, as I've come to visit the graves of my Grandpa and Grandma. I've known for years where Daddy (and Mama) would be buried. I just couldn't be prepared for that actual moment when it will take place.
Pray for us. We are getting through with a whole lot of praying together, checking on each other, etc.
Tonight, we went to an aunt's house (my Mama's sister) and had supper, amongst many, many family members- something like 45 were there. (Mama is one of 11 kids!)
I must say it was nice to see some who knew how we feel because they've been there. Their remarks are sincere when they say, "I understand how you feel, what you're going through." I appreciate those greatly.
Tomorrow, we will be having a viewing from 12 to 2 p.m. and then have the funeral and burial. This is at the church where my Daddy grew up. It's an old, old church, from the late 1700's. (YES! 1700's). Many a confederate soldier is buried out there, I know that, and many a folk with my maiden name were laid to rest there. I've visited the grave site many times through the years, as I've come to visit the graves of my Grandpa and Grandma. I've known for years where Daddy (and Mama) would be buried. I just couldn't be prepared for that actual moment when it will take place.
Pray for us. We are getting through with a whole lot of praying together, checking on each other, etc.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
In Georgia
This morning, around 7 a.m., we gathered in the living room and prayed for my Mama and my niece as they were getting ready to be taken to the airport. They arrived safely in South Carolina and Mama is with one of her sisters.
We attended church where we grew up- where my Daddy was Pastor, but my youngest brother now is. It was good to be there, to hear my brother preach, etc. We listened as he challenged the church to carry on with the legacy Daddy has left, to do the things he would want them to. We cried when we sang "Amazing Grace" as we sang it at the Florida funeral.
Sometime this afternoon, we headed out to make our way to South Carolina. What a rough week we have ahead of us...
We stopped halfway in Georgia for the night. We are all just exhausted emotionally and need this break. It was hard to leave our boys (staying with my inlaws) but I really think it was the right decision for all involved.
My sister in law and I were in our beds talking, recalling different things about Daddy's last days. We are all suffering but at least we are together and understand what the other one is going through. That is comforting. I am so glad we made the decision to stay in a hotel.
I went to bed but woke up not knowing where I was and just had to get up a few minutes.
I surely hope I can sleep tonight. It's getting hard.
We attended church where we grew up- where my Daddy was Pastor, but my youngest brother now is. It was good to be there, to hear my brother preach, etc. We listened as he challenged the church to carry on with the legacy Daddy has left, to do the things he would want them to. We cried when we sang "Amazing Grace" as we sang it at the Florida funeral.
Sometime this afternoon, we headed out to make our way to South Carolina. What a rough week we have ahead of us...
We stopped halfway in Georgia for the night. We are all just exhausted emotionally and need this break. It was hard to leave our boys (staying with my inlaws) but I really think it was the right decision for all involved.
My sister in law and I were in our beds talking, recalling different things about Daddy's last days. We are all suffering but at least we are together and understand what the other one is going through. That is comforting. I am so glad we made the decision to stay in a hotel.
I went to bed but woke up not knowing where I was and just had to get up a few minutes.
I surely hope I can sleep tonight. It's getting hard.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Funeral
The funeral was nice as funerals go... lasted just over an hour. The church was packed! The church seats 220 or so, and we had some that were participating in the choir loft, and had to get some chairs out.
Maybe one day I will post more in detail about the funeral, but right now I am exhausted! I am in the process of washing and packing for South Carolina. We are leaving tomorrow morning after church.
My Mama leaves (along with my niece) in the morning- flying. Glenn, Cala and I are heading out (in my inlaws car because of our van breaking down yesterday!), going along with my brother, his wife and their daughter in their car. We will spend the night on the road... I will try checking in there.
Yes, we finally made the decision to have the boys stay here with my inlaws.
More tomorrow.
Maybe one day I will post more in detail about the funeral, but right now I am exhausted! I am in the process of washing and packing for South Carolina. We are leaving tomorrow morning after church.
My Mama leaves (along with my niece) in the morning- flying. Glenn, Cala and I are heading out (in my inlaws car because of our van breaking down yesterday!), going along with my brother, his wife and their daughter in their car. We will spend the night on the road... I will try checking in there.
Yes, we finally made the decision to have the boys stay here with my inlaws.
More tomorrow.
Friday, July 11, 2008
In Heaven
Daddy died Thursday morning at 3:25 a.m. Eastern time. We were on our way to Florida when we got the call that he was gone. I am so sad I didn't make it, but God knew best.
We had the viewing tonight (Friday) and many, many folks came. It's strange to know that my Daddy's body is over there next door at the church! (he requested that it be left there all night). The funeral is at 2:00 p.m. EST Saturday (tomorrow) at the church. We will leave for South Carolina probably Sunday afternoon... the funeral there (where he and my Mama grew up) is on Tuesday (viewing before the funeral) and they will bury him in that church's cemetery. (the church where he grew up).
Pray for us. This house seems so empty tonight.
We had the viewing tonight (Friday) and many, many folks came. It's strange to know that my Daddy's body is over there next door at the church! (he requested that it be left there all night). The funeral is at 2:00 p.m. EST Saturday (tomorrow) at the church. We will leave for South Carolina probably Sunday afternoon... the funeral there (where he and my Mama grew up) is on Tuesday (viewing before the funeral) and they will bury him in that church's cemetery. (the church where he grew up).
Pray for us. This house seems so empty tonight.
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Called In...
This is it.... we literally were still at the hotel this morning when we found out we need to hit the road to Florida- the Hospice nurses say 2 to 3 days. Please pray for us... we are hitting the road in a few minutes... I hope to post from the motel, but we are driving as far down as possible, and so, it will be the middle of the night before we stop. I am sure I will be road weary, restless, etc. and so, yes I will get online if possible.
I wanted to be sure to post here before leaving because I can have more people praying.
I wanted to be sure to post here before leaving because I can have more people praying.
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Nice Time Out
We made it to the hotel right at check in time- at 3 p.m. and plan to stay here until check out tomorrow. Soon after arriving, we took a shuttle to the Mall of America, which we can actually see out our hotel room. (as well as the MSP airport!)
We really enjoyed the MOA and I am surprised by that. What I mean is I haven't been a mall person at all really. This place is just massive, overwhelming even but we sure had fun there. We ate supper there at one of my favorite restaurants, then took the shuttle back to the hotel. We went swimming and just about an hour ago now got back up to the room.
After getting everyone their showers and having our nightly family devotion time, we have the kids in bed! Whew.... Glenn, my niece, and I are about to watch a DVD- an old Alfred Hitchcock film with Carey Grant.
The best thing is this room is completely free! We have racked up enough points with this hotel chain that it's a free night. We just really, really felt strongly that we should come celebrate our anniversary now instead of waiting, hoping that things would be o.k. during that time.
I am really glad we came!!!! These kind of days do wonders for our mental well-being. It's great we brought my niece too! She is the type of person that holds her emotions in, but I know that she's suffering too... she's close to her Grandpa. This is hard on everyone.
Just talked to my Mama... also, I talked earlier to my youngest brother (this niece's Dad). He said that he's really glad we came when we did, because now Daddy is just truly there... just hanging on.
We will be home tomorrow afternooon. Catch you tomorrow night!
We really enjoyed the MOA and I am surprised by that. What I mean is I haven't been a mall person at all really. This place is just massive, overwhelming even but we sure had fun there. We ate supper there at one of my favorite restaurants, then took the shuttle back to the hotel. We went swimming and just about an hour ago now got back up to the room.
After getting everyone their showers and having our nightly family devotion time, we have the kids in bed! Whew.... Glenn, my niece, and I are about to watch a DVD- an old Alfred Hitchcock film with Carey Grant.
The best thing is this room is completely free! We have racked up enough points with this hotel chain that it's a free night. We just really, really felt strongly that we should come celebrate our anniversary now instead of waiting, hoping that things would be o.k. during that time.
I am really glad we came!!!! These kind of days do wonders for our mental well-being. It's great we brought my niece too! She is the type of person that holds her emotions in, but I know that she's suffering too... she's close to her Grandpa. This is hard on everyone.
Just talked to my Mama... also, I talked earlier to my youngest brother (this niece's Dad). He said that he's really glad we came when we did, because now Daddy is just truly there... just hanging on.
We will be home tomorrow afternooon. Catch you tomorrow night!
Monday, July 07, 2008
Monday
Today we went looking at a lake we were interested in knowing about. We had been told it was a clear lake with a nice beach area. We went to check it out to see if it was conducive to baptizing. (as one of the ones who joined yesterday was a 9 year old girl who has been saved but not baptized). We are not so sure it will be. SO, the search continues.
This afternoon I went to Wal-mart to pick up just a few things while my niece was cooking supper for us! Her Mom is Mexican and so my niece said she knew how to make a Mexican breakfast, so we had her do that for our supper. I enjoyed the time away alone, and I enjoyed not cooking.
Tomorrow we have the Backyard Bible Club here at our home and then we are heading out for an overnight. See, our anniversary is the 24th of this month and we really feel like we may be in the middle of Daddy's death, funeral, travel, aftermath of it all, or whatever... and so, we decided to go tomorrow night while my niece is still here. Last year while she was here, we promised her that THIS year we would take her to the Mall of America and so we are doing that. We have a free hotel stay (through having enough points with this chain), and they have a free shuttle to the Mall. SO, we are taking the kids and our niece and having a fun time tomorrow night and Wednesday morning.
I'll take the laptop with me tomorrow, so hopefully I'll post from there.
This afternoon I went to Wal-mart to pick up just a few things while my niece was cooking supper for us! Her Mom is Mexican and so my niece said she knew how to make a Mexican breakfast, so we had her do that for our supper. I enjoyed the time away alone, and I enjoyed not cooking.
Tomorrow we have the Backyard Bible Club here at our home and then we are heading out for an overnight. See, our anniversary is the 24th of this month and we really feel like we may be in the middle of Daddy's death, funeral, travel, aftermath of it all, or whatever... and so, we decided to go tomorrow night while my niece is still here. Last year while she was here, we promised her that THIS year we would take her to the Mall of America and so we are doing that. We have a free hotel stay (through having enough points with this chain), and they have a free shuttle to the Mall. SO, we are taking the kids and our niece and having a fun time tomorrow night and Wednesday morning.
I'll take the laptop with me tomorrow, so hopefully I'll post from there.
Sunday, July 06, 2008
Good Sunday
We had a good Sunday today. I am grateful for that. It really helps me emotionally, and as my Mama just said, "you need good days."
A family that has been attending our services here since right before Easter, joined this morning. What a blessing.
As for Daddy--- a new to them Hospice nurse came this evening and he said Daddy is still not at that "going to die in the next few hours or even the next few days" phase. Of course he also went on to say that he had never met Daddy so of course he can't assess him as well as the regular nurse can.
A family that has been attending our services here since right before Easter, joined this morning. What a blessing.
As for Daddy--- a new to them Hospice nurse came this evening and he said Daddy is still not at that "going to die in the next few hours or even the next few days" phase. Of course he also went on to say that he had never met Daddy so of course he can't assess him as well as the regular nurse can.
Saturday, July 05, 2008
Saturday
Just sadness filling my heart- full of memories tonight. Yes, someday I realize they'll bring me joy... now, they bring me joy mixed with sadness that we won't be making anymore memories with Daddy.
4th of July (Friday) post
We had a very nice 4th of July! I am super late writing this post because of it! For supper, Glenn grilled hamburgers and hot dogs. It was our family (including my niece of course). At 8 p.m., a family from church came by and we followed them to another (larger) city for fireworks that began at 10. It took about 20 minutes to get there, and then we sat our chairs and blankets in our desired spot and enjoyed some great fellowship. They had brought along sandwiches and other goodies and I brought a favorite dessert that I make. (and of course we all had brought bottled water in a cooler).
These fireworks were truly the best (or just as good) that I have seen in my life, and my life includes many times seeing Disney World's display. I am very happy we went!
We got home about 11, got the kids to bed, and my niece, my husband and I sat up until just now playing a new game we bought a couple of days ago- called, "Take the Train."
As for my parents... my Mama really can use your prayers. She had watched a video today from 1994--- in it, my Daddy and I were at our church homecoming, singing together, "He is Here." It served to make her sad for those days. Strangely enough I believe it must have been about 1994 when Daddy had radioactive seed implants to stave off the cancer.
Hope your 4th was good.
These fireworks were truly the best (or just as good) that I have seen in my life, and my life includes many times seeing Disney World's display. I am very happy we went!
We got home about 11, got the kids to bed, and my niece, my husband and I sat up until just now playing a new game we bought a couple of days ago- called, "Take the Train."
As for my parents... my Mama really can use your prayers. She had watched a video today from 1994--- in it, my Daddy and I were at our church homecoming, singing together, "He is Here." It served to make her sad for those days. Strangely enough I believe it must have been about 1994 when Daddy had radioactive seed implants to stave off the cancer.
Hope your 4th was good.
Thursday, July 03, 2008
Thursday
We've been gone basically all day today! Both Ethan and I had a therapy appointment, so we all loaded up early today and hit some stores that this bigger city has. We got some good deals again and I find that a blessing from God! When fall hits, and school time rolls around, we won't have to shell it all out at one time for Cala and Ethan's school clothes and supplies.
After attending this therapy session, I am thankful once again for our great insurance that allows us to go at no cost. What a blessing!
As for Daddy, my Mama said that today he has been more awake, eating more, etc. This could very well be the "rallying" that we've been told he'll do.
Thanks for the prayers!
After attending this therapy session, I am thankful once again for our great insurance that allows us to go at no cost. What a blessing!
As for Daddy, my Mama said that today he has been more awake, eating more, etc. This could very well be the "rallying" that we've been told he'll do.
Thanks for the prayers!
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Wednesday
This morning, we decided to ride over to another city, just to show my niece an area she had not seen last year when she was here. Although I had not planned to spend any money really, I am glad we went to Wal-mart there. I have been trying to buy Cala and Ethan's school clothes a little along so we don't have to buy them all at once come fall. I don't have as much luck finding clearance deals for Ethan as I do for Cala, so it was a nice change today... I found Ethan 2 shirts, and also his tennis shoes for school. ($5.00 for Spider-man tennis shoes that light up- normally $15.00 a pair!- You can't beat that!). To top it off, the shirts I got, were actually 2 shirts in each- one long sleeved, one short sleeved that came together for $3.00. I got two sets of shirts- so in reality, 4 shirts. Ethan was happy.
After church tonight, Glenn, my niece and I, decided to watch a movie on DVD. I just woke up and woke the other two up as we fell asleep! ha
As for Daddy---my oldest niece is in Florida- arrived today, from Oklahoma. She will be there until Tuesday. Pray for her as she says "Goodbye" to Grandpa. This niece is just 7 years younger than me.
After church tonight, Glenn, my niece and I, decided to watch a movie on DVD. I just woke up and woke the other two up as we fell asleep! ha
As for Daddy---my oldest niece is in Florida- arrived today, from Oklahoma. She will be there until Tuesday. Pray for her as she says "Goodbye" to Grandpa. This niece is just 7 years younger than me.
My Mama
Tuesday- I have cried a ton of tears today, especially this evening. My heart is so heavy for my Mama right now.
Please pray for her.
Please pray for her.
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