Christmas, Trying to press on....

Christmas was a good day. Of course, underlying was the fact that this was Daddy's last with us. That was hard. That was super hard. To me it felt like we were all actors in a play and trying not to talk about the proverbial elephant in the room... that thing that was weighing heavily on all our hearts and minds.

We started our celebration with Daddy trying to read the Christmas story from Luke, but he was unable to finish and so my youngest brother took over. We all gathered in Daddy's room, around his bed for this, and so it will be a memory that stands out throughout my life. Daddy said he was so glad we were all together and then he prayed.

I believe we all tried to check in with him throughout the opening of gifts, eating our meal, etc. It was indeed nice to be all together.

*** *** *** ***

This past Wednesday night, Glenn and I hosted our nieces and nephew, along with our kids here at Mama and Daddy's house, for a sleep over. We had invited them for Christmas Eve Eve (Dec. 23rd) for our family tradition, but our kids were sick that night. This took the place of it and we had pizza, played games, watched movies, had a good time!

Then, as if that weren't enough fun, on Friday, Glenn and I and our kids, my middle brother and his wife, their daughter, my youngest brother's daughter, and two of my oldest brother's kids all went to the beach! This was in lieu of what we call our "Cousins Trip". Let me back up and explain... I am not really sure when our first ever trip was like this, but back when Glenn and I first married, before we had our first child, we would take my nieces and nephews (whoever was here at that time) for what we called back then, a "Nieces and Nephews" trip. We would go out to eat and spend the night at some motel, where we could swim and have a good time being together.

Enter our daughter, and now it was no longer a "nieces and nephews" trip, but rather a "Cousins" trip! This time, not being able to afford two motel rooms as it would now take, but wanting to do something with them all (especially since two of them brought it up!!!!), we decided to ask one of my brothers if he and his wife could take a load and accompany the cousins to the beach. We had a picnic there and stayed 4 hours or so!!! Everyone had a great time and it was just what we needed that particular day. I wouldn't trade that memory for anything! We said all day, "I am so glad we did this."

NOW, being the glutton for punishment that I am, (HA!), once we got back here to Mama and Daddy's house- around 6:30 p.m., we rushed everyone through the shower, and once all were finished dressing, off we went to the MALL!!!!!! Ugghh.. I am so not a mall person, but do confess to loving to go watch people! This was a previously planned mall trip (planned before the beach was planned). When I told the cousins about going to the beach, as I knew would happen, my 16 yr. old niece replied, "does this mean we're NOT going to the MALL?" HA HA Wouldn't you know it, my 9 year old daughter asked the very same thing?!

It was perfectly timed though at the mall, as once we got there, we only had an hour before they closed! Couldn't have worked out better, don't you think?

**** **** ****

I am very glad for these memories- the fun times amidst the pain. I can't forget however that Thursday, I leave for Minnesota. I am so sad about that I can't imagine what I'm going to do. Continue praying.

Crying that doesn't Stop.......

I spent the entire evening service last night at church, crying. The tears would not stop no matter how hard I tried. Each Sunday night, my brother has the congregation have a prayer time- go around and all who want to, prays. I always have participated but last night, when it would have been my turn, I knew not to try. The tears wouldn't stop. Yes, I've cried in church before in front of others, but not to this extent. Grief I am finding, is horrible. It's hard. It's tiring. It takes the energy right out of your body.

I also am finding that everyone grieves differently. I am sort of thankful for that, and sort of not. I know I make little sense these days.

Glenn, our daughter and our baby son were sick yesterday and missed church. The two kids that were sick had high fevers. We had plans for last night to do our traditonal camping out on Christmas Eve Eve, and make cookies for Santa. We had planned to have my nieces join us. So, we would have been at my parents for the night- however, we didn't want to bring this sickness on him.

I am thankful this morning that all fevers are gone. We will leave my inlaws soon to get Christmas groceries.

Tonight, we will let the kids open one present and we will all put on our new pajamas. We are trying to press on with our traditions.

Pray for our family... please. Tomorrow will surely be happy and sad.

Tonight

All I could think about at the viewing tonight (Thursday) was how glad I was that it wasn't the same funeral home as where my Daddy's body will be. (There are two funeral homes in my home town here). I also couldn't help but be very sad and want to do nothing but run away, screaming as I ran.

It struck me tonight how people there were very sad of course, grieving, but yet others (visiting) were laughing. I thought how sad that must be for the grieving folks. Maybe that's just me, I don't know.

Tonight, I will be in the room with my Daddy... as I write this, it's almost 1 a.m. He's been dreaming, calling out for my youngest brother, as well as calling his oldest brother (who has been dead for many years now.). Tonight, he called out, "No, not tonight."

I can't help but be sad. I am losing the person who so much to me I can't begin to write the words.

Death of Family Friend

Just yesterday morning, a dear family friend died. This hit us hard. Her family has been quite close to us through the years. They were members of our church here in Florida (where I grew up and Daddy is Pastor) for many years. Then this lady's son in law (who grew up in our church here) became Pastor of a church and they eventually went there. Their grandson's wife is a close, close friend of mine.

This is just all very sad. Sis. H went into the hospital a couple of weeks ago with an infection that was never determined the cause. She eventually had a heart attack one night, another heart attack yesterday morning and died.

What struck me was that her daughter and son in law were here to visit Daddy this past week... the son in law came to not only visit Daddy but to work on a light that was having trouble in his room. They stayed a long time and never in their minds was the thought that their Mom/Mom-in-law would soon be gone.

What also struck me was that a few weeks ago, Sis. H of course knew of my Daddy's situation and never would have she known she would beat him to heaven. Wow. You just never know.

I must say I am glad that her funeral is being held at a different funeral home than is handling Daddy's viewing. (his actual funeral will be at church). I just don't know how I would handle that. After all, I passed by the funeral home last week, saw some mourners outside and bawled. I asked God to touch them, comfort them.

I do praise the Lord that tonight as I type this, Sis. H. is rejoicing in the presence of the Lord! That's great... sad for her family. They are surely devastated.

Depression

First off: yes, we are still o.k. No other door shakings have gone on... although this evening, a woman we have met a few times came to the door to tell us that someone had been messing with the dogs. She told them to stop and off the man went. Hmmm... then tonight we saw a man on a bike- no big deal, I just took note that his eyes met ours. Within 2 minutes, the police had surrounded him, frisked him and cuffed him. Away he went. Hmmm....

*** *** *** ***

Depression has set in with me I do fear. Yes, I know depression. Through terrible events many moons again, I know it well. I fear life without my Daddy- plain and simple. That's it. I fear it.

Pray.

A Bit Nervous

Last night, around 11 p.m., one of my brother's left for the night. My parents were about asleep and so I went to the computer to check my email. Let me say here, I rarely do this at dark since in this room where the computer is- the blinds are broken in places and so I know someone could see me.

Ten minutes later, I get the distinct feeling that someone is watching me. (I've had this feeling twice before and both times I was right). I told myself though that I'm just crazy- no one is watching me, I'm just a scaredy cat. (of which I'll readily admit I am in some cases). HOWEVER, I couldn't get this feeling to shake and so I just while still emailing, reached back to the dining room table and grab my purse which was in plain view. I moved it next to me and kept typing. Another ten minutes or so passed when someone shaked the door handle and then shook the door, trying to get in! I jumped up, ran towards my Daddy and Mama, hollering, "Mama! Daddy! Someone is trying to get in, I'm calling the police!" SO, I grabbed the phone and began dialing. After I got off with them, I immediately called my brother asking him to turn around and come here for the night. He did, and found a shot gun and all seemed well. (Yes the police came, were very nice, but since I didn't see anyone- no, I wasn't going to look! My instinct was to run!!!, they couldn't do anything more).

My brother, my Mama and I were then in the living room talking, trying to calm down when within thirty minutes, it happened AGAIN!!!! My brother jumped up, I jumped up (in a somewhat comical manner- since I was in a lift chair and didn't want to wait on the slow remote to get me up!). My brother hollers with gun in hand, and I call the police yet again. Some more (now) comical stuff ensues, but yet we were now scared since we didn't expect it to happen twice! The police came back and said they would be watching the house and back inside we went.

I felt very bad for my Daddy who was upset about not being able to protect us. I cried and said, "Daddy, still my first instinct was to run to you! You being here still makes me feel better!" It was an emotional time for sure.

We are now talking of safeguarding measures, etc. and making sure a man is always here at night. My oldest brother and his family have been in Mexico this past week visiting my sister-in-law's family and come back tonight. While my middle brother and I go pick him up at the airport, my youngest brother and children will be here until we get back.

I can't shake this feeling- and now it's dark. I'm leaving the computer until morning.

Pray for us!

Small Update

We had a nice Thanksgiving. It was very sad for me when I realized this would be Daddy's last. Oh sure, I knew it was, but really facing it is different!

My sister in law and I went Black Friday shopping and had a great time. It was nice to get out.

Today, being Saturday, we went to yard sales. Nothing major, but we had a good time together.

Tomorrow is church- I'm looking for great results in Minnesota!

Daddy is having more wild dreams. He had a really rough night last night, crying out in pain. He said the radiation has definitely worn off. He's so very tired.
;o(

Happy Thanksgiving!

This is a 'bittersweet' Thanksgiving at best for me. I really miss my husband and daughter (and my house) this morning. It's 22 with a windchill of 11 at our house and is snowing. (very different than here in Florida!)

It will no doubt be the last Thanksgiving with my Daddy here.

My inlaws traditionally go to my parents on Thanksgiving (Glenn is an only child and it would just be them alone so Mama has long invited them too). Today it will be my Mama, Daddy, my oldest brother and his family (wife and 3 kids), my youngest brother, his 2 kids, my 2 boys and me, my inlaws. That's 15 of us. We are having a real feast- turkey, dressing, ham, mashed potatoes (I am quite sure there will be gravy too!), green beans, corn, hashbrown casserole, baked beans, sweet potato casserole
Dessert: pumpkin pie, pecan pie (Cool Whip to top them), apple pie, cherry pie, coconut pie (my mother in law home made the cherry and coconut ones).

And of course we will have rolls and sweet tea!

My Daddy has always been the one to do the dressing for the turkey. Glenn called him asking for his dressing recipe, yesterday.
Glenn is a great cook, but this year will be his first turkey- he's doing the dressing though like my Daddy always did. (we've been doing that since we lived in Russia- but called yearly to ask how- never wrote it down- sure have now!).

Seriously- do pray for us! We are going to put tables in the living room so we can all sit as close to Daddy as we can (he's in a hospital bed in their room).

Daddy's Dreams

Today (Wednesday), I didn't get to the house until around 4 p.m. I left after church at 8:30. Daddy wasn't awake at all during that time. That's unusual during those hours. I was sad not to really see him. (meaning not awake).

I walked in his room when I first got there, got in the bed we got for Mama last week... Daddy was saying, "Dad, Hey Dad! Howell! Howell!" I immediately cried and left the room. Howell is my Uncle Howell, Daddy's oldest brother (lacked one day of being 10 years older than Daddy). Uncle Howell died a few years ago of leukemia. It was touching to me that he's seeing his Dad and his brother, but hard for me to realize that we will go through much more of this.

In other news: please say a prayer for my health. I'll perhaps mention more someday.

Transmission :o/

Unfortunately, the problem with our van IS indeed the transmission is shot! Ugghhh $1800 to be re-built at the place where they gave us the free estimate. An acquaintance has told us about a place that would possibly be a few hundred dollars cheaper... we will look into that on Monday. We had it re-built about 3 years ago!

Now praying it will make it another couple of years at least when our truck will be paid off and we can afford a newer van.

Life is ever interesting.

Daddy had a rough day- in good news, we found Mama a bed! It's a day bed like we wanted so it will serve a dual purpose of being a place for guests to sit. We got it for $25. Same bed was $139 at a SECOND HAND place!

Praying for church services to go well tomorrow.

My Wednesday

Daddy did it... he preached from his bed. Now, let me back up and say the devil sure must be after us! I took my parents' van to pick up my mother in law for church (father in law stops by church on Wed. on his way in from work). When I cranked the van (after stopping at my inlaws), it wouldn't crank! (Remember MY van is shot!?). As my mother in law was on the phone with her brother asking him to run us three (my mil, me and my oldest brother) to church, my brother was praying and I got it cranked (but putting it in neutral, cranking and then going!).

Sure enough, once we got to church, it wouldn't go again. Oh well! We made it. Do pray concerning all these van troubles. I said if my inlaws' car cut off on the way home (since I was driving), I was done!

Back to Daddy: he preached concerning, "In My Father's House". I taped it on cassette as well as I called Glenn and he and Cala put it on speaker phone and were able to hear the sermon! (got to love that!) I believe all who heard were touched by the subject matter and the fact it was preached by a dying man who will soon see all these things he was talking about. He closed by asking us to sing the hymn, "How Beautiful Heaven Must Be".

In other happy news: 16 years ago today, Glenn and I started dating. We both remembered. We always do :o)

Out of Sorts

I don't even know how to describe how I feel tonight other than "out of sorts". I feel blah, uggh, just don't know. I got to spend maybe 5 minutes with my Daddy today, as this morning he had to go to the ER for his catheter to be replaced. That took a long time in the waiting on transportation back home, etc. (since he can't sit up, an ambulance had to bring him home as well as take him there of course). After I talked with him a few minutes, I had things to do and he was asleep anyway. This evening, since my van is broken down, I came home with my inlaws. I thought of using their car to go back to my parents' home (my father in law offered), but in the end I just felt like I needed the 'down time'. Although, now I'm not too sure. I just feel like woe is me, cranky, you name it. I broke down crying tonight- good to have inlaws who are so understanding and caring. I felt ridiculous, but oh well. This is just so hard.

My Daddy wants to preach tomorrow night! If so, this will be from his bed, and those gathered will be there at the parsonage (Wed. night service is now usually held at the parsonage). What a touching time this will be. Pray he's able to do so.

I am just sad tonight. Really really sad.

Another "one of those days" post

Ever had a day that started out well but ended up terrible? I sure have today! This morning we were taking our time here at my inlaws getting some much needed washing done, etc. This afternoon- well, all bets were off!

I carried my oldest brother, his wife and their two youngest children somewhere and on our way back, my van broke down. We were on a very, very busy highway in the middle of rush hour traffic! Ugghh. A tow truck was called and off we went. We actually had a blast as the tow truck (an acquaintance of ours for many years) hooked the van up and towed us home to the tune of $45. Ok, so spending $ is not a blast, but the ride home was. It was a much needed laugh really as we were "way up high" going through town.

I am soooo praying it's not the transmission as it might very well be. We were hoping this van would last us a couple of more years before having to buy another one. Now, at the point of desperation, a.k.a. no money!, we pray for God to show us what to do.

I do praise the Lord that the van didn't do this tonight when I would be traveling through some dark roads with the boys on the way to my inlaws. I certainly praise His name that it didn't take place traveling from Minnesota or to there! What a mess that would be! Things could definitely be worse!

My father in law came by to get us on his way home from work. I asked if he could stay 10 minutes as I was just getting ready to get in the shower and so he did. I got dressed and realized that the pair of jeans I put on- the zipper is broken! ughhh.... I had to laugh as this afternoon when we started out in the van, my sister in law asked if I realized the dress I had on had a hole in the seam around my waist! Ughhh....

As for my Daddy- well, he called me in the room right before I left there tonight... Ethan (my 4 year old son) had come in there and said, 'Grandpa, I'm going to miss you." Thinking Ethan was talking about when he went to his other grandparents house, my Daddy said, "I'll miss you too, son." Ethan replied, "no, no...I miss you when you go to Heaven." The tears streamed down my Daddy's face! (mine too as he told me about it). I then told Daddy that I just am not ready to let him go, and he said, "I know... you never really will be."

Long Story Short

The short version is it's been a long day.... yard sales this morning with my sister-in-law (in which we found nothing!), supper with my brother and my sister-in-law to Sonny's Barbecue... in between there my middle brother took care of the boys and took them to the park! I dropped them off, he walked them back home, first stopping at McDonald's for Happy Meals and also to let our niece and our nephew join them. SO, there was my middle brother (who has grown kids), taking care of 4 little ones- a 9 year old girl, 2 four year old boys and a 2 year old boy. I must interject that the boys are all rambunctious!

I then took my 9 year niece to Wal-mart tonight. I know how it is to live in another country, come to the states and long to see Wal-mart again! I imagine at age 9, it's even more urgent to get there! I haven't had much time with this niece, and so it was very nice to be with her tonight. (once again, I'm writing well past midnight and am referring to Friday night). She talked non-stop but was so funny. I miss Cala, and this niece is 12 days younger than Cala so this was really good for me.


Tonight however, I had my father-in-law pick up the boys on his way home from work. I was thinking this way I could spend extra time here with Daddy before heading to their home to sleep. Then, Daddy asked me and my brothers to come talk to him, and I ended up spending the night here.

We are heading to yard sales in the morning.... praying we find a bed for Mama and some comfortable chairs for guests that will visit Daddy.

Exhausted once again.... goodnight.

I'm writing this after midnight, but when I say "today", I mean Thursday. Today, my oldest brother and his family arrived from Paraguay. (where they are missionaries). My two other brothers and I went to pick them up. Under normal circumstances, we would be happy to all be together, as this is a RARE occasion. (the last time being about five years ago). This is anything but normal circumstances!

It was great to meet my brother's two youngest children. They've had them home for a little over a year. It was a bright spot in the evening when we got my boys together with these two. Cousins meeting for the first time was neat. My brother's oldest daughter is just 12 days younger than Cala. They have been together three times in their lives. I am looking forward to next month seeing them together again.

There are bright spots. There are terribly sad, somber spots. I know one thing- there's comfort in having all my brothers around. I feel I can exhale a bit now. Tonight, me and the boys moved to my inlaw's house. I will probably spend most of my time at my parents' home, but come here late to sleep. I told my mother in law that honestly, while I want to and feel the need to be "down there" (eight miles away), this will be good for me... a place to 'retreat' so to speak from the gloom that is filling the air there.

Last night, (Wednesday), was an interesting church service. We had it at the parsonage, and my youngest brother (who is Daddy's co-Pastor and well, really now THE Pastor) preached a "funeral" sermon basically. He just felt led of God to do this as he stated "when it comes time to bury Daddy I'll probably need Valium". We opened the door to Daddy's room and it was a strange feeling to hear this dying man say, "Amen", to hear him sing along a bit with his favorite hymn, "All Hail the Power of Jesus' Name"... knowing that soon he'll be in the presence of Jesus! Wow.

I am filled with much emotion. There's gladness and sadness. I go between the two. Mostly sad. I know joy will come at some point.

Mental Health Day

Today was what I guess you could call a "Mental Health Day". One of my brothers and I (the middle brother) took the boys to yard sales. How can that be relaxing you ask? I simply love yard sales/garage sales or carport sales as a dear departed soul used to call them, whatever you choose to say, I love them! It is not often that I have someone with me that enjoys them as much as my brother seemed to today! We enjoyed some laughs and it really did serve to take our mind off of everything.

We didn't even find what we set out looking for- a car seat for our oldest brother's baby girl and a bed or roll away for my Mama (to sleep in the same room with my Daddy since he is now here in a hospital bed). Any other day I would see car seat after car seat but not so today! I saw a wonderful bed get sold for just $10 (yes, it was a great bed) right as we pulled up to one sale! We will keep looking.

I did come back with some toys for the boys. That served to keep them more occupied and they even behaved better today.

As for my brother? Well, he started the morning thanking me for giving him a new hobby as he was really enjoying the yard sales. He ended the day however, saying he would not be returning next week as he simply bought too much "junk". HA HA! He was hilarious.

I think I'll get him in the van next Friday!

He's here

Daddy is home now. He came home (by ambulance) last night. My brother and I spent yesterday afternoon breaking down Mom and Dad's bed, cleaning their room (dusting, etc.) and then someone came to install a hospital bed. Turns out the hospital bed is hard as a rock and miserable. As I write this, the home health nurse is here and she will be told about the bed. Hopefully another one can be ordered. This one appears to be super old.

Side note: The doctors suggested Hospice but for whatever reason, Daddy doesn't want them yet. In these matters, of course we are letting him decide. (at this point). I think he's overwhelmed really.

By night time I was honestly ready to collapse. Thank the Lord for my inlaws taking care of the boys. They spent the night there and I picked them up early this morning.

Emotionally, I am I guess what you would call, "spent". I think at this point I am past crying, although that's probably not true either, as singing a song this past Wednesday night (at church) reduced me to tears. There are just so many strange emotions going on, and they can change daily, even hourly.

Last Night

Last night I spent the night at the hospital. We finally convinced my Mama to go home and get some rest. Of course she called me wanting to know how he was, etc. I can see that it's not easy honestly for her to go home and not be with him. I can understand that. I can only imagine I would be the same way were it Glenn in that hospital bed.

It truly sounds strange to say I enjoyed my time with my Daddy, but I did to a degree. I enjoyed being able to be with him since this is the new reality we all must face.

After having a "good" day yesterday, he had a really bad night last night. Today he slept most all day. Mama and I spoke with a representative of Hospice to learn more about what they are all about. We have some decisions to make. We are leaving the final say so up to Daddy. Pray that all is according to God's will. No easy answers right now.

Please also pray for my oldest brother (lives in Paraguay) to be able to get here soon. He's working on changing his ticket (which is currently for Dec. 4th, arriving here the 5th). He needs to get here a.s.a.p. Daddy is waiting on him.

Tomorrow, church. Glenn is going to have a service with Daddy at the hospital. I think that will be nice for them both.

I will go back one night this coming week and stay the night again. In about a week, we think Daddy will come home. We have a lot to do in that time though to get their house ready. Pray for us.

Florida

I couldn't post about it on Monday, because we didn't tell my family... but we are now in Florida. We left Sunday afternoon after church, spent that night in Illinois, Monday night in Georgia and made it in on Tuesday evening. Tuesday evening, we already had it set up with my inlaws to eat supper with them and for the kids to spend the night there. We rode down to my parents' house (8 miles) before Mama left for the night (to go to the hospital).

We had chosen not to tell my family, because as Glenn said, "why give them anything else to worry about- worrying about us while we travel, etc." What an emotional time it was when we arrived at the door! I am so glad we came now instead of later.

Yesterday was when I saw my Daddy. I spent several hours with him, and from 4 p.m. until 10 p.m., it was just us. That was certainly special, even though it was heart breaking at the same time.

Today, I am at 'home' (where I grew up), doing some cleaning, going to make supper later for everyone, etc. Glenn and Cala have gone now to see Daddy and pick Mama up for the evening. We will take her back at 10 p.m. I however will be spending the night tomorrow night, alone with Daddy. I want my Mama to rest here at home. They've been married 51 years. This is surely taking some adjusting to, I am positive.

As I sat there last night I began thinking back to when I was a kid... hearing Daddy snore made me feel safe, at least knowing that he was there, and all was well- he could and would fight off any 'bad guy' should there be one to appear. Here however, last night, as I sat in the hospital with him, listening to his bi-pap machine (for sleep apnea), I thought about how while I still knew he was there, all was not well. There indeed was a 'bad guy' in the room, by the name of Cancer. This is a monster that Daddy can't take care of, and soon, I will be without my Daddy that I love so very much.

Grief has begun.

The Past Three Days

Cala's party on Saturday went very well! Most importantly, Cala has a great time! When all was said and done, there were 20 kids here and one adult that stayed a few minutes. The adult was one of our neighbors that we had yet to meet. That was really nice. They moved in while we were in Florida this past summer and although I kept meaning to get over there and meet them, one thing after another would keep me from doing so. Now, I wish we would have met weeks ago. We really had a good time talking Saturday!

Cala got lots of nice things and one funny thing she did: After everyone sang the traditional "Happy Birthday", they went into "How Old Are You?, How Old Are You?". As soon as they were done, Cala blew out her candles and said, "I may be small, but I'm 9 years old!" It was priceless and everyone laughed!

Following the party, I thought my feet would break. The invitations read 1-3 p.m. and so her classmates went home right after 3. The neighborhood kids though all stayed and played until I finally had to tell them Cala had to come in. That was near 6 p.m. Of course, I like having them here. I like knowing where my daughter is :o)

*****

Sunday: A lady came to church, stood in the back during the message (arrived late). She got gone before we could speak to her, but the building attendant said she told her that she had seen one of our flyers. We are uncertain as to whether or not she received an invitation at her home, or if she had seen a flyer at a local business. (we've checked, and thankfully our flyers have pretty much stayed put around the area).

God is working! He reminds us this just at the right time it seems. We are thankful for this.

*****

Today (Monday): Due to Cala having a fall break this week, and it being her actual birthday, we stayed on the road throughout the day. We had a great day celebrating her birth! We had a picnic type lunch and Cala chose our restaurant for supper. Tomorrow, we are planning to be gone most of the day again, taking in the fall colors and cool weather. This week is all about family. :o) I want our children to have great memories of times we spend together.

My Daddy: All continues "status quo" so far. I will continue to update as I get word.

There's a Party Goin' On Right Here

Yes, you read that right... amidst the sadness here, we are today having a Birthday party for Cala. She turns 9 years old on Monday! I absolutely can't believe she's this "old." She's been our daughter since she was 2 years 7 months old, but at that time she was much more like a baby than the toddler she was chronologically.

We've invited her class from school as well as the neighborhood kids. I wrote on the invitations "RSVP appreciated but not required". (I personally would hate to have someone not come because they didn't rsvp). We have had at least 7 classmates RSVP and about the same amount in neighborhood kids. I will be interested to see how many we have in the end.

I will try to post pictures a.s.a.p. It will be a nice distraction from everything else.

Following the party, we will clean up, then collapse for awhile (lol) before heading to Wal-mart to buy some things we didn't get yesterday, for the coming week.

Dates on a Calendar

I am writing this after 1 a.m. so technically it is now Wednesday, October 10th. So, yesterday, the 9th is what I want to talk about- It was fourteen years ago that day that I called my Daddy. Strangely enough, he was in the hospital then, and I was calling him with the sad news that I had miscarried my first baby.

Here we are fourteen years later and oh how I wish he were in the hospital for something "simple" as what they called back then a "bleed out" (from an ulcer). We were worried about him then, but not as we are now. No, now we know we are faced with our Daddy dying. I can't even type those words without breaking into tears.

Usually at this time of year, I have some down days due to so many tragic things happening to me in this month of October. I should have known it would be October when we got this terrible news.

My daddy is dying... my heart is breaking... I am fighting to not cry all day...

I cried myself to sleep last night. Now I pray I will rest tonight. I was in bed long before this last night- now it is the exact time I was sobbing last night. I think I will try getting some rest. I pray I can.

Prayer

So last night I'm feeling low as I was coming back from a grocery store. I felt kind of silly, but hey! We have church services in a school, and so I pulled to that school parking lot (since that was the city where I chose to go to the store!), and prayed. It just helped to be near "my church".

Then as I was coming home, I called my Mama. We talk two to three times a day, many times more. Daddy told her to tell me he loves me, and I asked if he was able to talk to me. HE prayed with me! Let me tell you, that broke me down. I took a few moments to compose myself and be able to drive.

This is going to be hard, so very hard. HOW on earth do folks without Jesus get through times like this?

Life Upside Down

I really don't know why I took so long to update this blog, but as of yesterday life has been tured upside down.

This is a picture of my Daddy with Cala, taken this past June when we were in Florida. Daddy is a Pastor in Florida, at the same church since I was 6 weeks old, and I am now 36. Over 7 weeks ago, on the way in the door from church, Daddy fell and has spent his time in the bed, ever since. Two days ago he went to the hospital and is now on the Oncology floor. Yes, we've known he's had prostate cancer for nearly 15 years. In the past year, he's taken chemo as it got a little worse. We were all coping with that and doing well. Because of the fall though, he has had no chemo, and we assume during that time is when his cancer spread. They found out yesterday that his cancer is now in the stomach and his back.

This Daddy's girl is not doing too well right now with all this. I feel as if I can't breathe. Please pray for us all.

I Said I'd Be Back....

Thanks to those who sent me cards on Monday or emails telling me they were praying for me. I sure appreciate it!

Today I just wanted to take the time to announce the arrival of my great niece, Michelle Faith. She was born today to my second oldest niece, in Oklahoma. Baby Michelle joins her big sister. I also have a great nephew from my oldest niece who also lives in Oklahoma. I didn't really feel old until I got to thinking that it seems so weird this brother of mine is a GRANDPA three times over now! HA Now that for some reason seems strange. Our family is funny like that though- our oldest brother has the youngest child, his youngest daughter being just 20 months old. Then the next brother is the one who has the oldest child, just 7 years younger than me :o) He's the Grandpa. We have one other brother who has 2 older kids (a 20 yr. old and a 14 year old) and then there's me with my brood. Wish we could all be together in one place some time. That would be interesting!

In other news: ever feel like you just can't escape for a moment's time? If you're a Mama you know what I mean. At least I certainly don't think I am the only one with this going on! ha I'm in the bathroom tonight (no, I'm not blogging from the bathroom, silly, I mean earlier), and the kids were upstairs brushing their teeth. I suddenly hear, "Where's Mama?" from Seth. He had come downstairs and if Mama isn't around, well, all is not right in the life of this 2 year old. "Where's Mama?" he repeats, and Glenn chooses to not answer, only to tell him to go do something he was previously told to do. I start almost laughing as I hear him go upstairs saying, "uh, Papa said I was a BAD BOY!" (which Papa did NOT say). I laugh because the next thing I hear is "Where's Mama?" from Ethan, and then Cala. I keep thinking that at least I know I'm missed. Glenn told them I was in the bathroom and they went about playing. Seth on the other hand comes and waits outside the door, and when I come out says, "Oh Mama! I didn't notice you were in the bathroom. I thought you went somewhere!"

Ah, one of these days I shall report that I actually made it to the bathroom unnoticed. Certainly it's possible????????? Please tell me it's possible?!?!

For now.....

Today I'm just sad. I'll be back happy again, probably even tomorrow! But for now, I'm just sad. You see, it was four years ago today that I miscarried a precious baby that I didn't even know I was carrying. We were living in Russia and that day was terrible.

Yes, I had a miscarriage back in 1993, and while horrible too, the one in Russia really affected me in a different way. I think a lot had to do with being so far away from everyone I loved most. Some of it had to do with not even knowing about the pregnancy. Still more had to do with seeing the baby when I miscarried. Sorry if too much info!

Any way, I just am sad. It is on days like this, I visit the website I made soon after that day- http://www.angelfire.com/blues2/evanfaith It helps, it really does.

I am ever thankful for a couple of friends who never forget these days! October 9th will be the 14th anniversary of my first miscarriage. Yep, I have a few sad days this time of year, but rest assured, I'll be back. I always am.

Time Flies, yeh, it really does......

I have often said that I feel as if yesterday I was 17 years old, turned around and now am 36. Time really does fly! I felt as if I posted here yesterday, but alas, it's been 10 days! Yikes. A lot has happened in that short period of time:

Seth had his 2nd Family Day- what a special time it was celebrating this precious baby man being a part of our family. One of these days I'll post the pictures from then, as well as the pictures from Ethan's Family Day last month!

Our missionary helpers left this past Monday- he called today to check on us; they are now in Michigan for a few days.

I am enjoying babysitting a neighbor girl 2 to 3 days a week. It's extra income that's nice to have, plus it's just fun to have her here honestly. I say it's sort of insight into how it will be like having another girl when we adopt again. (in a couple of years or so).

Today- well, today was a strange sort of Sunday. The devil was after us I am here to tell you... I often tell my kids to not let the devil take place and he seems to want to do that the most on Sunday mornings when we're getting ready for church. It usually starts with Seth and Ethan fighting. Today was no different, but it was quickly (as Barney Fife would say), "nipped in the bud" by their Papa and me.

We got to church and as Glenn was taking the pulpit in, a piece chipped off when going in the door. Instead of getting radical about it, I tried to remind Glenn that we could glue it. We got inside only to learn our normal room was being used for testing, but we had been moved to another room for today- let me just say a much nicer room! (more expensive, and I LONG for the day that we NEED that much space and have to rent it!). No one came, no one other than us. That was discouraging... I'd be lying if I didn't say it was.

While I'm singing with the keyboard, my book slips completely, I grabbed it, never missed a note I might add, and held it by one hand (obviously playing the keyboard with the other). I quickly said, "ah! if you don't believe that's the devil!!!"

Glenn had a good sermon on salvation (which by the way, those working there can certainly hear us so we know we're being a witness in some way!). When we got everything loaded back in the van, we took off only to find our sign was down!

Someone had obviously knocked our sign down from the side of the road- impossible for the wind to do it, never mind the fact that it was not a really windy day at all. This was just about all we could handle and the car ride home was quiet. I felt today as if we were all, all five of us, including the kids, discouraged! Even little four year old Ethan said today, "We sure need some people here." Cala was already upset because she consistently invites folks only to be told, "not today", etc. (and this happened this morning).

Glenn spends every weekday passing out invitations, doing his part and so I know he must feel down. Yet, he has never admitted it- until today when I plain out asked. He said, "yes, I guess I am discouraged a bit today."

And yet.. God is working. Our Sunday School lesson was on Gideon and not being a quitter even when it seems what's the use! Wow did that speak to me! To top things off during our family prayer time, Ethan prayed, "God send people to our church in Big Lake". That had me crying! God is working. We believe that.

Pictures Anyone?

Our Last Summer Hurrah on Monday: We enjoyed a picnic supper at one of the local parks. I love this picture of my kids walking hand in hand.






Seth tried his hand at baseball


First day of school came on Tuesday and as is "first day of school" tradition, Papa made omelets for breakfast. Soon it was time for Cala to get ready and she was sure excited to be going off to Second Grade!




Ethan's bus comes for him in the afternoon. He has pre-school Special Ed (here his class is called SR or School Readiness... in Florida we would call it K4) 2 hours a day, 4 days a week. He couldn't wait to get back to school, although he's had a hard time realizing that things are different this year, with a different classroom, a different teacher, etc.




As soon as Ethan left, it was time for Seth to start K2 here at home.
It has been really fun teaching Seth! What a difference there is in him and Cala at that age! ha ha I used to wonder if Cala was getting anything I said, but realized she was, she was just in need of being on the move. Seth is the typical two year old, into everything he can get into, but for school, he sits and listens intently:
That's refreshing!

In other news: I'm not exactly taking it easy with just Seth at home. I took Cala to the bus stop her first morning and came back with a babysitting job for one of our neighbors! I'm taking care of her daughter on the days she's not in Kindergarten (here they go two to three days a week). SO, I'll have her (she turns 6 soon) either two or three days each week as long as both her parents work those days. She keeps me hopping!

Tonight however, Glenn and I are going on another date. Our missionary helpers are leaving us on Monday, tomorrow is the local high school football game and Glenn and the missionary are going, Saturday is Seth's Family Day (but we're celebrating Sunday). Cala is going to Brownies camp tomorrow night and we have to go pick her up Saturday evening. So, tonight is our date night. I better go make sure I have clean clothes to wear! ha

Not as we planned

Unfortunately Sunday came and went without any extra people at our new meeting place. HOWEVER, we are not totally discouraged- disappointed, yes, but not down and out. A- this was Labor Day weekend, not the best week to expect people to come as it is such a cultural thing here as the "last hurrah of summer". Many, many people are at lake homes on the weekends (or cabins), and we passed a whole lot of folks at local lakes and beach areas at the lake. SO, we press on, expecting good things next Sunday!

AND we heard some more yesterday about a group that's meeting in a city 25 miles away that are of our same beliefs. Part of the group moved to that city from another town close to 2 hours from here. They moved from the only other church in the state of Minnesota, that's a part of the same Association we are. They are meeting (we assume in homes?) as they couldn't find a church they felt led to. We will be put in contact with them this week- this could very well work into us having services with them, as well as where we currently are meeting! This would be exciting to us! We should know more in the coming day or two.

On a personal note: I woke up with PINK EYE! Never a dull moment! ha We are heading out right now to have a picnic supper for Labor Day- last day before school starts. Catch you later :o)

Lost on a Saturday Evening

Glenn and I had a nice date Saturday night. (I am writing this at almost 2 a.m. so technically it's Sunday now). I had been wanting to go to eat at Baker's Square for quite awhile (for those who know Perkins, well, it's a step above to me but the best I can describe it). HOWEVER, while we were on our way, I said, "you know we haven't had Mexican food in a long time now!" It seems our guests do not care for Mexican food (gasp! I can't understand that! lol) and so I haven't made it in weeks which is highly unusual around here.

We ended up at what turned out to be a GREAT Mexican restaurant run by real Mexicans-which usually means it's going to be good and not Tex-Mex. We were happy anyway and will definitely go back. Who knows? Maybe next week?! I say run by Mexicans. They were cooking- Americans were the waitresses and ours did as many do and asked me where I am from. When I responded, "Florida, and I get asked that a lot", she said, "I bet you do!" We told her we've lived here now a year and she asked, "and you've still kept your accents? That's neat!" ha Turns out she's lived in Georgia before and said when she would ask for a "pop" they would say, "what?" We got a good laugh from that. We completely understand! :o)

We needed to go by Wal-mart (don't we always?!) but alas I have this terrible curiosity that leads me to often ask, "where does that road go?" So, off we went on one of those roads tonight and uh... got lost! ha Let me clarify a bit: there is a certain city we have heard about that we have wanted to visit for a few weeks now. We saw a sign that pointed towards it and went off the highway to see how far away said city was. When we got off the beaten path (or on it?!), we quickly saw a detour sign but no sign stating how many miles it was to this place. We kept going- through mile after mile of beautiful rolling pastures, farm land everywhere, beautiful red barns, beautiful cows, you get the picture- we were completely in the country. We loved the drive, but we never found the place we were looking for, but DID end up in a "township" as some are called here that we had never heard of. However, we were passing a house that had several men out on the deck. One waved at us which is quite common here in Minnesota. Knowing how friendly most Minnesotans are (and I do mean friendly!), we stopped and asked them how to get back to a town we go to often and would eventually lead us home! After finding out just that, we were back on our way through the country- and uh... did I mention we needed gas? Gas light comes on, we are a good 13 miles still from the next city that we know of. IF we were in our van, we would have never made it to a gas station, but we were in Glenn's truck. Thank the Lord! We made it to another small town we had heard of but never been to (so that was neat to now know where that place is!), and got gas. I should insert here that the first gas station we came to was a brand of gas that if we had been in the van, it would have cut off- it has 4 times with that brand so needless to say we don't run it in the van. Yet again, this was the truck and it took it just fine.

On our way we did go, found our Super Target, decided it would do just as well as Wal-mart for the things we needed and in we went. Cell phones are a great invention as Glenn could go one way, me another and we could call to find out where the other one was, and oh, uh, honey, what do you think about us buying _________ ? lol

We had left our home at not quite five. When we got home tonight, it was after nine. The kids were sleeping, all but Ethan and after checking on him, telling the missionaries we had truly gotten lost on the way home, we came downstairs. Glenn printed out our church bulletin for tomorrow, I practiced the song I will sing, "For Such a Time as This", and then practiced on the keyboard for the songs we will sing as a congregation tomorrow.

So why am I up at 2 a.m.? Couldn't sleep after all the excitement I guess!

Sign

I think we were all very excited today when Glenn came in with the above sign! Cala stood by it pretending she was at church... I heard her say, "Welcome to Maranatha Baptist Church! We're glad to have you here today!" That's the PK coming out in her for sure! I think at some time or other, ever PK plays "church!" Cala did have a good idea though when she said we need to get our family picture by the sign on Sunday. We'll be sure to do that- of course on Sunday, it won't be here in our bedroom! It will be in front of our new meeting place!

By the way, it's a cream color- not sure how it's showing in this picture- not exactly true to form. And you see where the crosses are? In between there, Glenn is going to make something that will say the room number where we will meet.

I dreamed last night we had 50 show up for our first service there. Now, that would be wonderful! Of course in my dream a cousin of mine from South Carolina was there. When I asked why, he replied, "Of course I'm here!" ha ha

It will be neat to see what God is going to do!

Miscellaneous happenings.....

Staying busy around here gearing up for our church to begin meeting outside of our home for the first time! (this Sunday). We are excited about the possibilities and praying to see many people come!

Glenn and the missionary staying with us have been busy daily and today was no exception. They were able to pass out many invitations today and talk to some folks. Monday, they got our sign ordered and should be able to pick it up tomorrow. I spent this morning making phone calls. I first called one of the local newspapers to see how we can get our church listed in the church directory. I got that taken care of but need to remember to call some other papers tomorrow.

I also made some calls to the school and to the immunization clinic, where Ethan will need to get a shot taken care of tomorrow. I am just sure Ethan will be thrilled tomorrow afternoon! ha I originally thought Seth needed one too, but they said no, so he dodged the needle for a few more months anyway!

It is really nice having the missionary couple here willing to watch the kids for us in cases like this- tomorrow, we will be able to just take Ethan and leave Cala and Seth here with them. They also want us to go out by ourselves so Glenn and I will have a date Saturday night and then again next week sometime. That's a blessing.

In other news: Open house was last night- Cala is excited about school starting again next week, and really enjoyed seeing her friends from last year. Ethan had a good time meeting his teacher for this year and seeing his new room and the other two classes where he'll go part of the week. He's in Pre-school, special ed. AND while we were there yesterday, Ethan's teacher mentioned that there are preschool classes there for even Seth's age. He turns 3 the end of November but would be in the 2 year old class this year. He has no known delays so would be in regular pre-school. I mentioned that while we knew about this class, we simply can't afford it. She explained that we can have the fee completely waived if I'll volunteer every now and then! No problem! It's just a 2 mornings a month class for Seth but he will love those 2 times. The other days, I am home schooling him in K2 through A Beka. He's excited!

Got to go....... yawn.....

Melancholy Day

Today was the last Sunday morning service we will have in our home. Next Sunday begins us meeting in a nearby city, the city we feel God leading us to plant this church. It's exciting to us to see God working! This coming week, Glenn and the missionary staying with us will be super busy getting more invitations out, etc. Tomorrow, they are actually going to buy the materials needed to build a pulpit we can transfer with us to and from the meeting place.

We will still meet in our home on Wednesday nights for prayer meeting. I titled this "Melancholy Day" because I guess I know that this past year will be looked back upon as a special time in the life of this church, a time when God worked in our lives to draw closer to Him, praying for His direction for the church.

This past Friday our neighbors were supposed to come for a cook out but were unable to. They did so last night. We had a really good time! It's nice to be able to get to know our neighbors, something that we have missed. In Russia, I can recall our first apartment, where we knew very well the elderly lady next door whom we called, "babushka" or "Grandma" and the mobster across the hall. Lest you gasp, we lived next to a mobster in each of the four apartment buildings where we were in Russia. It was just expected! ha..... memories.......

And so it continues....

Today (or yesterday really since as I type this it's 1:15 a.m.)- Tuesday, Glenn and our missionary helper spent several hours passing out invitations to our first meeting. They were touched by an elderly man who invited them in his home. He explained he already has a church home, but that his wife just died this past Sunday. Glenn asked if they could pray for him and he readily agreed.

They also visited Wal-mart where they will soon know if they can pass out invitations there. The woman they spoke to believes they'll be able to. They said there was only one woman who literally ran as they were walking down the street towards her house. She was getting out of her car and looked scared by our helper.

*** As for the kids: Our daughter had a very full day as a neighborhood girl showed up asking her to play. She popped her head in for some water, and to ask me if she could now go across the street to some other neighbors' house to play with their daughters. It seems today, she was very popular. She's already asked if she could return there tomorrow, and funny girl- she got a bath tonight and put on shorts and a shirt so she can eat breakfast and be ready! ha! My girl is a mess! ***

Company, Church, Family

We have company here for the next four to six weeks. I really look for them to be here for six weeks. That's great with us! This couple is in their 50's/60's and our kids are already calling them Grandpa ______ and Grandma ________. It's good for the kids having "grandparent" figures around for this long. Of course the kids are really enjoying "Freckles", the dog they brought with them. I've never been an indoor dog person, but Freckles will make you fall in love with her.

The purpose of this couple being here is to help us in our church plant. We have held services in our home since we moved here last year and that's been with limited success. Oh! Folks have been asked to come, but alas, there are many excuses given, blah blah blah. We were recently given the go ahead by a school in our "chosen" city to hold services there. Those begin on September 2nd. We are excited by this!

Glenn and the missionary helper spent the day today nearby our meeting place, visiting businesses, putting up fliers and telling people about church. They were thrilled that every single person they spoke with was very friendly and readily agreed to place the flier. I have said all along that Minnesotans are noticeably friendly! They then returned home where Glenn spent awhile making door hangers that they will use in their outreach next week. Things are getting exciting around here!

**** Family Night: Our Friday tradition is family night. We traditionally spend this time playing a board game, or playing basketball, or in the past we even had a water gun fight, and another time we played "Hide and Go Seek". However, we recently decided that until the weather gets "bad", we will go to a park each Friday following supper. Tonight was no exception. Our missionary helpers decided to enjoy some quiet time (I imagine they were happy to have some peace- ha) and stayed home. We enjoyed the break from home and watched the kids play and play. They had such a great time this evening. Their laughter is infectious! It was cool though. As I write this, it's a nice 54 degrees. Ah.... fall is just around the corner.

Two Years Ago......

Two years ago this past May, this was the boy we saw in Ethan, a small 2 year old happy we were there to show him attention.



He got to spend the week with us and we were all thrilled to have that time together. It was so very hard saying bye after that week was up and leaving not really sure when we would be back for him (and Seth).


It would be in August that Glenn would return for Ethan and August 13th when they flew to the states. This is the night we were reunited as a family. We spent that first night together in a motel to have some down time together.


This is our family picture- before Seth arrived a little over 3 weeks later. I am not sure but I believe this is our only such picture before Seth. Either way, it's precious. Ethan was going through so much at this point, just arriving in a foreign country with foreign sounds, foreign smells, white people everywhere! I would love to know what all was going on in his mind at this time. I am just so thankful that it all worked out and he is now a genuinely happy boy. Oh, we still have our moments, he still is working through some issues, but he's a precious gift and I am so thankful he's "mi papito."

Yesterday, we celebrated his 2nd Family Day. I was in tears as Glenn prayed thanking God for giving us Ethan. I hugged Ethan and he actually said, "Mama, thank you for adopting me!" My heart melted as I said, "son, thank you for being mine". Tomorrow I will post pictures from our Family Day celebration. Tonight, I leave you with a poem I wrote (and posted here) a year ago for the boys' dedication:

THROUGH A WHOLE LOT A LOVE
- Amy Barker McCarver (aka Mama)

We dreamed of a son to call our very own.
By the miracle of adoption, he would come into our home.
Where he would come from, only God knew
Then suddenly we felt Him saying, “not one son, but two.”

Once we were sure Guatemala was the place,
Much had to be done, so we began the paper chase.
Home study to be done, our life stories to be told.
Our sons were now a small baby, and one 2 year old.

We got to meet you both in your birth land,
Got to hold you, look deep in your dark brown eyes, and walk hand in hand.
The day we had to leave, it seemed our hearts would break.
To not have you with us, seemed more than we could take.

Then months passed and finally the time came
Papa got to bring Ethan home, our lives would never be the same!
Just three weeks more, and Seth came at last
The heartache of waiting was all in the past.

Genetics? No, but he’s simply your father, I’m your mother.
Cala’s your sister, and you each are the other’s brother.
And today as we dedicate you to the Lord above
May you remember you got here through a whole lot of love.

Photo Show

Ever feel just dumb?

Ever feel just stupid?!

We have been busy this week getting everything finalized with the school where we will soon start meeting. As it stands now, we will begin there the first Sunday in September. It's a requirement of theirs that we provide proof of church liability insurance. Well, it's taken a lot of calling various insurance agencies since most places won't do it for our type of situation since we don't have church property, but will be meeting in a school. We were sort of in a "catch 22" until we got the finalized plans from the school, because we had to provide the exact location (there are of course Elementary schools, a Middle school, and a high school) to the insurance agency. However, to get everything completely set up with the school, we have to provide the proof of insurance. ha

Anyway- Glenn is out when the insurance agent calls that can praise the Lord write an insurance policy for us. He asks if we have a fax number- I say yes but I'm not sure which number our fax machine is set up to! uuuggggh *We have 2 lines- they were offered 2 for the price of 1, so we went ahead and set up a church line.* I felt dumb not knowing which was set up for fax! Glenn's cell phone was dead, as I did ask the man to wait while I tried calling Glenn.

I wouldn't feel so very dumb if it weren't for when I first talked to this same man earlier in the day, I couldn't even remember our phone number!!!!!!! Then when I began telling him, he asked for the area code and I stumbled on that!

We are coming up on living here a year, so pretty soon I can't use the excuse of "uh, we just moved here". ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Preparing for Company...

We have a preacher and his wife coming to stay with us for a month! They will get here either Friday or Saturday. So, we are going to be busy getting things ready for that. We are excited about them coming as they will be here to help us in the mission work. And about that...

Yesterday, we spent the day researching more about our chosen city and today we await word about the place where we prefer to meet. Glenn has a phone call today concerning that. He's been in touch with them before and today we hope to nail down everything.

In other news: Cala has been spending this week at Brownies DayCamp. We take her at 9 a.m. each morning and pick her up at 3 p.m. She's having a blast, hiking every day in the woods, playing games, etc. etc.

Last night, we attended our town's National Night Out. I sat there thinking how different it was to live in a small town. How different, how neat, how strange, how cool. Guess I haven't completely nailed down which emotion suits it best!

Our Last Summer Hurrah

Thought I would share pictures from our anniversary trip a couple of weeks ago. Cala enjoyed the lazy river although she looks as if she would fall through the float anytime! She was quite the fish that trip, constantly asking when it was time to swim.



Many times when swimming, Ethan is apprehensive, but this time he really let loose! I think he actually enjoyed himself. This place had slides even for the little ones and he loved sliding into the water!




Seth has always loved getting in a pool and this time was no exception!

Tragedy in the Cities- we're o.k.

Please pray for the victims and families of the bridge collapse in Minneapolis. This is a major catastrophe and it just aches our hearts at how many of those folks may not have known Christ. :o/ There are at least 3 confirmed dead... 50 cars at least crashed into the Mississippi River when the bridge collapsed (as 20 construction workers were repairing it!!!!) This was during rush hour... we have been on that bridge a few times. Praise God for His protection!!!!!

We knew nothing about it until my mother in law called from Florida. She saw it on their news and wanted to make sure we weren't out and about in the Cities! Thankfully we answered the phone right as it was to quit ringing, or she would have been frantic!

We had "special" prayer tonight for these folks and the families. Thank you for joining us in prayer. Cala prayed and thanked God we weren't on that bridge! This really touched our kids. We try normally for them not to see the news as I just don't see the point in them having to see such horrible things at their age, but they were in the room when I turned it on. They saw a school bus on the bridge and were worried about the kids who may have been on that bus for summer school, or camp, or whatever reason. We have since heard the kids were evacuated, but there are many injuries.

**For my out of the country readers, I am sure if you go to http://www.foxnews.com or any of the major news sites, you will find the story.**

Achoo Moo Moo

Veggie Tales fans will understand the title! :o)

We are battling a summer cold around here! It's going through us all, well, except Ethan. He seems to still be on what I call the "orphanage immunity". Cala was the same way until a few months ago!

Anyway... back to the pictures I promised....

My beautiful niece, who will turn 16 on Thursday, came home with us when we were in Florida. She stayed 10 days with us and then we put her on a plane. We had a great time with her, and this particular night we surprised her with a little "party".

Here's the moment of surprise: We laughed a lot because we had spent that day going to a pizza buffet and then to the park for a picnic. All that was for her but she didn't know it. I had decorated the upstairs when she was outside. She came upstairs, we hollered surprise, and she kept going to her room. She suddenly comes back and says, "Surprise?! What surprise!?" ha She didn't realize what we were saying! We had her a couple of gifts and a cake, etc.

The next pictures are of my niece with Glenn, with me, and then with the kids. These were taken the day she left- at the airport:









It is this picture I love! You see, right here, we have 5 nations represented! Erika's Mom is from Mexico and her Dad (my brother), is American, so there are two countries right there. Then, we have my children who represent Russia, El Salvador and Guatemala. What beautiful cousins they are!

A Couple of Cool Give-a-ways!

5 minutes for Mom is giving away a new Flat Panel LCD HDTV courtesy of Best Buy! Go over there and enter! As they say, "Someone's gotta win!" :o)

Then, stop on by I Should Be Folding Laundry and enter to win one of the new Febreze candles :o) I LOVE candles!

Continuing pictures

Tonight I will continue our pictures from the past few weeks.

While on our way home to Minnesota, from Florida, I had the privilege of meeting two different online friends. On the left is me with Karen. We met a few months ago online through a Baptist group I have for Mamas :o) As it turned out, Karen also adopted a baby boy from Guatemala. She and her husband came home with their son last year. They also just happened to stay at the same bed and breakfast outside of Guatemala City that we did! It was really neat to stop by Karen's home in Kentucky and get to meet her in person!





Then, as we continued on, that very same day, we stopped in Illinois and got to meet a friend named Joy! Joy and I met about four years ago online through the same group. We really enjoyed meeting Joy and her family and going to eat supper with them. I am so glad we got this chance to meet in person! It was like the computer coming to life!

Tonight I will cut it short and try to post some more pictures tomorrow of when my niece was with us! I am achoo- achooing right now with a summer cold!

Achoooooooooooooo!

Notice my new post

My new post I began and saved as a draft until I could finish it.... anyway, it actually posted under yesterday's post, so scroll down to see the post entitled, "Fourteen Years Ago- and Today". Thanks!

Not the post I intended

Today is our 14th anniversary! It's been a very nice day and I had intended a post about that, but I will get back to that tomorrow....

Instead I ask that you go visit my dear friend, Suz at her blog: http://russianadoptiondva.blogspot.com In the past four years, Susie has become my very dearest friend! That she is suffering like this just breaks my heart. The little girl that they have been in process to adopt for 2 years now (in Russia), will now not be theirs. I just don't have the adequate words to express how my heart aches for them.

I know some of you that read are not members of the adoption "community", but I would greatly appreciate you taking the time to visit Suz' blog and even post a comment there to let her know you are praying for her family! Thanks!

Fourteen Years Ago- and Today

Fourteen years ago, I was just 22. Glenn was 21. Fourteen years ago yesterday, we were married in my hometown, at the Missionary Baptist Church where we grew up- my Daddy was (and is still) the Pastor. Glenn's Dad is a deacon. Fourteen years ago, we sure looked different and life was different- never did we expect life to take us to Russia and then to Minnesota! Never did we really expect to have children from 3 different heritages. We are so glad that God led us to Russia, then Minnesota, and ever thankful for the 3 kids that are ours. They may be nuts, but "they're our nuts!" ha.

Fourteen years ago, we sure didn't look as happy as we do today, did we?! ha ha I promise you, we were thrilled. We must have been tired or in shock! ha

Can you spot the little nose right behind Glenn? That was Jesse, my now 19 year old nephew. He was the "train bearer" (carried the train of my dress). He was just five years old and super close to his Aunt Amy. (or "Ay-wee" as he called me). He spent the entire reception crying, not just crying, wailing because he thought that when we left for our honeymoon, I would never be returning! He was very upset about it!!!!

Wonder what we would change if we knew then what we know now! Something to think about. I think God certainly doesn't reveal the supposed "big picture" to us for a really good reason! I know I would probably make a mess of His ultimate plan if I knew every little thing that would happen.

By the way, we had a really nice 14th anniversary. I am truly blessed to be married to Glenn. As is our tradition, if on Valentine's or our anniversary we can't go somewhere without the kids (and right now we don't know anyone well enough to leave the kids with).... then Glenn cooks our supper, a special meal just for him and me. We had a wonderful meal last night- rivaling any restaurant!

As I write this, we are almost 2 hours from the house- spending two nights at a nice hotel, that through our Choice Rewards points, is totally FREE!!!!! (the best kind!). Yes, the kids are here, that's true, but we're enjoying this family time in celebration of our anniversary. It's our last hurrah before school starts again and our church begins meeting in the city we feel God leading us to plant it in. We are currently waiting for the man in charge to call us back with the finalization of when we can start.... we want to be meeting there (in a school) by the first Sunday in September.

One more thought- wonder what life will look like fourteen years from now?! I'll be uh.... 50. gasp.

Pictures from Florida

As promised, here are pictures from our time "back home" in Florida... by the way, while we were on the way to Florida, it hit me that my kids were making that trip I once made, back to my parents home. Ok, so when I was a kid, the "home" we were heading back to was South Carolina, but you get my point.... They were on our "back home" trip to Florida. To our kids, Minnesota is home.

The boys sure loved their time at my parents' home. Here they are late one Sunday night being loving brothers! This reminded me of the many Sunday nights I spent as a child... it had been a long day filled with church, etc. and Mama would cook breakfast foods for supper. I rarely got in bed at a regularly scheduled time on Sunday night!

This particular Sunday night was no different.... the kids were up late, but hey! It was at Grandma's and Grandpa's house! What can I say?!

It was a time to be cherished that's for sure... I tell you this time like no other was surreal being back in Florida. I can't explain it. I don't know why this would have anything to do with it, but living in the states now and returning "home" must play some role in why it felt so strange, so different. Glenn felt the same way.

During the mid-week, prayer meeting was held at Mom and Dad's house, the parsonage. This particular night, a girl I grew up with, like a sister to me came. It was so nice to see her again. We just HAD to have a picture of Tammy and me with our babies. (Her son is just 3 months younger than Seth). You see, when we were kids, we would spend each day together, in this same home- the parsonage. One bedroom would be Tammy's house, another would be mine. We would bring our pretend babies to visit each other and talk about the price of diapers and baby food! What a hoot to be here together with our real babies!

We had planned the trip for a long time, and originally this was to be a surprise trip. However, when it was decided that my youngest brother (who by the way is 8 years older than me) would be ordained, then we ended up telling everyone we were coming. The ordination was definitely a highlight of the trip. This shot was taken just after the service was over, right after Daddy's tie had come off and Scott's suit coat had too. ha I still love this picture.

It was a wonderful time that's for sure, being back in Florida, back in my hometown, but the best thing was seeing these dear folks, my Mama and Daddy. I sure do find that the older I get, the more I miss them! I am ever thankful for such great parents.

Alone after all this time?

It hit Glenn and me yesterday that our family of five hadn't been "just us" (save 2 days on the way down to Florida) in the past six weeks, until yesterday! How strange.... My inlaws came, spent two weeks with us, we had a great time, traveling to South Dakota with them....they left, we went to Florida, were there two weeks, but with the traveling to and fro- we were gone a total of 3 weeks, and brought my niece back with us.... she left yesterday. Wow! Yes, it's been six weeks since it's been just our family!

I thought over the course of the next few posts, I would share some pictures from the past six weeks- Tonight we will start with my inlaws being here, and us going to South Dakota....

Cala and her Grandpa (Glenn's dad) pan for gold in Deadwood, South Dakota. Cala absolutely loved it!

Of course she has her Grandpa wrapped around her little finger! Today in fact while talking to him on the phone, she said, "When I am a teenager I am coming to visit... I want all my toys gone and teenager clothes hanging up, maybe some make up and some jewelry- earrings would be great!" ha ha What a character.... she turns 9 in October!


Glenn, Cala and I in South Dakota. Scenery is beautiful there! We thoroughly enjoyed seeing the mountains, the lakes, the wildlife, etc.











All of us stood in awe of Mt. Rushmore, even the boys still talk about "Mt. Mushmore". I certainly hope to one day go back there! It's one of those places you just HAVE to go see!

And finally, something I know at least one of my faithful readers (hey my brother Ted!) will appreciate as I think I got it from him! ha..... We realized not only were we an hour or so from Wyoming which we had previously visited, but my inlaws had not- we were not that far from the Montana line, which we had never set foot in. SO, we just HAD to go! Sure next year we have a trip planned to Washington state for an associational meeting, and Montana will be thoroughly visited, but could we wait?! Pass up an opportunity to be able to say we had been there?! Of course not! And so, we drove through mile after mile of country, seeing antelope after antelope along the way (that was really cool!), and made it to Montana! The little town across the line was Alzada, a true "spot" in the road, but I am proud to say I now have a magnet that actually says, "Alzada, MT" on it with a picture of an aforementioned antelope! :o) Visit again this week for some more pictures...

Next up: pictures from our time "back home" in Florida.